Taboo to Truth: Life & Sex After 50

Do men need emotional connection to feel desire? The story we all learned says men just need a body and an opportunity, and women are the ones who need to feel close first. For a lot of men, that story is backwards. They just never say it out loud. I break down why men are taught from adolescence that wanting closeness is needy, and how that unspoken need shows up instead as irritability, withdrawal, or a sudden drop in desire. I explain the difference between vasopressin and oxytocin, why men often bond through shared effort and shared goals instead of long conversations, and how attachment style can make a guarded man disengage from intimacy as a form of protection, even decades into a relationship. Then I walk through the five places connection gets built or lost in long-term and midlife relationships: open communication, active listening, quality time, empathy, and physical touch outside the bedroom. You’ll hear what each one looks like in real life, why empty nest couples often lose quality time to logistics, and the easiest one you can restart tonight. This episode is sponsored by ARYA, a monthly intimacy membership curated by AASECT-certified sexologists. Take the quiz at arya.fyi and use code TRUTH15 for 15% off. Check out my S*x Snacks: https://www.taboototruth.com/post/sex-snacks In This Episode: 0:00 – Do Men Need Emotional Connection to Want S*x? 0:07 – The Man Who Proved Me Wrong 0:30 – Why the “Men Just Need a Body” Story Is Backwards 1:20 – Attachment Style and Why He Pulls Away 2:19 – 5 Places Connection Is Built: #1 Open Communication 3:26 – #2 Active Listening 3:56 – Sponsor: ARIA 4:32 – #3 Quality Time: Vasopressin vs. Oxytocin 5:22 – #4 Empathy Without Fixing 6:12 – #5 Touch Outside the Bedroom 6:43 – Final Thoughts: Look for the Disconnection First To watch the video version of this episode, head over to YouTube! About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Relationship Coach. She tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. On this show, we explore the intricacies of sex in midlife, offering insights and support for all those experiencing this transformative phase. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com MORE LINKS, RESOURCES, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS & FREEBIES! 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

In this episode, I sit down with researcher and men’s relationship coach Melanie Curtin. She asked more than 1,000 women a question most men think they already know the answer to: what actually makes a man great in bed? Her findings blew up a lot of assumptions, mine included. We start with the number that stopped me. 61% of women say they’ve broken up with someone over the sex, and most never said a word to him about it. Melanie explains the pattern she saw again and again. A woman speaks up once or twice, watches nothing change, and decides to grin and bear it so she doesn’t feel like a nag. I share my own version of that story from my dating life right now, plus what menopause and dryness add to the mix. We get into why pain is one of women’s top complaints in bed and never shows up on men’s list, and why so many men touch a woman the way they’d want to be touched. Melanie’s rule is simple: if she asks for anything, multiply it by ten. We also talk about the arousal gap, the shame spiral that follows performance anxiety, and why the women in her research almost never mentioned erections, endurance, or a great body. The best lovers did something much simpler. They paid attention, in and out of the bedroom. Part two is coming next week, so stay close. 💓 This episode is brought to you by OBOO, makers of vibrators, lubricants, and vulva care for women in perimenopause and beyond. Use code TRUTH15 for 15% off at https://oboo.love In This Episode: 0:00 – Sponsor: OBOO 0:34 – Welcome to Taboo to Truth 1:08 – Meet Melanie Curtin 2:21 – How the Research Worked (and Why It’s Subjective) 4:59 – Have You Ever Broken Up Over Bad Sex? 6:30 – Why Women Speak Up Once, Then Give Up 8:51 – Men’s vs. Women’s Top Sex Problems 11:12 – Why Her Body Is More Sensitive Than He Thinks 13:05 – Slow and Light: The 21-Minute Arousal Gap 14:30 – Menopause, Dryness & Why Slowing Down Matters 16:12 – Performance Anxiety: Why Some Men Stop Dating 18:33 – Why He Touches Her the Way He Wants to Be Touched 19:30 – The Couples Who Grin and Bear It 20:26 – Turn Her Feedback Up 10x 21:51 – Ask the Right Question, Then Actually Listen 22:25 – Masculinity, Menopause & His Silent Changes 23:16 – What 97% of Women Never Mentioned 24:12 – The Best Lover She Ever Had (No Intercourse) 25:37 – Losing an Erection Without Losing Her 27:30 – What 37% of Women Remembered Most 28:55 – Feeling Seen Is Foreplay 29:46 – Part Two Coming Next... About The Guest: About The Guest: Melanie Curtin is a sex and relationship coach and Stanford-educated sex researcher whose research is published in the Harvard Dataverse. She helps growth-minded men have thriving sex and love lives, whether they’re single or partnered. She surveyed 1,067 women about what makes a man great in bed, what makes him forgettable, and what they wish they’d told a past partner. She’s also the host of the Dear Men podcast. Connect with Melanie Curtin: Website: https://www.melaniecurtin.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/melaniebcurtin LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/melaniecurtin Podcast - Dear Men https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/dear-men-how-to-rock-sex-datingand-relationships-with-women/id1347811999 About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Relationship Coach. She tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. On this show, we explore the intricacies of sex in midlife, offering insights and support for all those experiencing this transformative phase. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com

In this episode, I’m talking about what diabetes, high blood pressure, and heart health have to do with your sex life, and why a change in your erections deserves a doctor’s visit, not a private panic. Most men who notice a change ask themselves the wrong questions first. Am I still a man? Am I still desired? Is this the beginning of the end? That identity filter is exactly what keeps them out of the doctor’s office. Erectile difficulties are not a verdict on who you are. They’re a health signal. I walk through how high blood pressure and diabetes affect blood flow and nerves, why some blood pressure medications can be the real culprit, and why the arteries in the penis often show damage years before the heart does. I also get honest about where the shame comes from. Men were taught that masculinity lives in their erections, so any change feels like an indictment. It isn’t. It’s information. My ask: find a doctor you see regularly, so when the harder conversations come up, you already have someone you trust. And if this lands for you, send it to a man in your life who needs the nudge. ‼️ Your erections can flag a blood flow problem years before your heart does. That’s why I partnered with FirmTech, a smart ring that tracks your erectile health so you get real data instead of guesswork. Get 15% using my link and code TABOO15 at myfirmtech.com/karenbigman Sign up for my free newsletter, where the real, unfiltered stuff lives: https://www.taboototruth.com In This Episode: 0:00 – Your Erection Could Be a Warning Sign 0:18 – Welcome to Taboo to Truth 0:44 – The Identity Filter That Keeps Men From Getting Checked 1:06 – ED by the Numbers: Diabetes & High Blood Pressure 1:29 – How Blood Pressure and Diabetes Affect Erections 1:47 – When Your Blood Pressure Meds Are the Problem 2:10 – Your Body’s Barometer: The Heart Connection 2:47 – Newsletter Break 3:06 – Embarrassment, Quick Fixes & Where the Shame Comes From 3:36 – The Biggest Obstacle: Not Seeking Help 3:58 – Find a Doctor Before You Need One 4:34 – Final thoughts To watch the video version of this episode, head over to YouTube! About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Relationship Coach. She tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. On this show, we explore the intricacies of sex in midlife, offering insights and support for all those experiencing this transformative phase. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com MORE LINKS, RESOURCES, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS & FREEBIES! 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

In this episode, I'm back with urologist Dr. Amy Pearlman for part two of our conversation. We start with a question I hear all the time: does ejaculating often protect your prostate? She walks me through the research, why masturbation counts, and the plant-forward way of eating that protects your prostate along with every other organ. Then we get into prostate cancer. Dr. Pearlman explains why most men die with it rather than from it, when active surveillance makes sense, and why you should get more than one opinion before choosing a treatment. Most importantly, she explains how men can protect their sex lives: starting penile rehab before surgery, seeing a pelvic floor physical therapist, practicing with a vacuum pump, and using Trimix injections when Viagra and Cialis aren't enough. She even believes many men can have the best sex of their lives after treatment. We finish with penis size. Dr. Pearlman shares why she asks every patient about size concerns, what traction therapy can realistically do for length, why she uses dissolvable hyaluronic acid for girth enhancement, and why you should always ask what the worst-case scenario is before any procedure. Her final advice: go to every appointment prepared, with a list of questions and a goal. Most men have no idea what's actually happening with their erections until something goes wrong. That's why I partnered with FirmTech, a smart ring that tracks your erectile health so you get real data instead of guesswork. Get 15% off at myfirmtech.com/karenbigman ‼️ Join the waitlist for my upcoming coaching program for midlife men HERE. In This Episode: 00:00 – Intro 00:45 – Does ejaculating more protect your prostate? 02:05 – The diet that protects your prostate (and every other organ) 03:18 – Prostate cancer and your sex life 04:26 – Active surveillance: when you don't need treatment yet 05:00 – Why prostate cancer usually has no symptoms 06:14 – Your treatment options, and why to get more than one opinion 07:44 – Why penile rehab starts before surgery 08:24 – Pelvic floor PT before prostate surgery 09:26 – Learning the vacuum pump before you need it 10:00 – Trimix: penile injections explained 11:08 – How men learn to do their first injection 12:05 – Why injections work when Viagra doesn't 13:46 – Better sex after prostate cancer? 15:23 – Why men are obsessed with penis size 17:16 – Girth enhancement with hyaluronic acid 20:00 – Can you actually gain length? 21:30 – The worst-case question before any procedure 22:38 – What is Phallofill? 25:11 – Use ChatGPT to prep for your doctor's visit 26:47 – Where to find Dr. Amy Pearlman 27:38 – Outro To watch the video version of this episode, head over to YouTube! About The Guest: Dr. Amy Pearlman is a board-certified urologist and fellowship-trained specialist in sexual medicine, male hormonal health, and genitourinary reconstruction. She is the co-founder of Prime Institute in Miami, where she takes a modern, evidence-based approach to optimizing sexual health, hormones, and longevity. A nationally recognized educator and speaker, Dr. Pearlman is passionate about making conversations around sexual health more practical, approachable, and engaging. Her work bridges traditional medicine with emerging therapies and technologies, helping patients better understand their bodies and the growing number of options available to improve sexual function, confidence, and quality of life. Connect with Dr. Amy Pearlman: Website: https://www.primeinstitute.us Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/amypearlmanmd YouTube: @DocAmyUrology Podcast: Fertility and Other F Words About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Relationship Coach. She tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. On this show, we explore the intricacies of sex in midlife, offering insights and support for all those experiencing this transformative phase. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com MORE LINKS, RESOURCES, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS & FREEBIES! 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

In this episode, I'm opening up the toolbox most men refuse to touch: penis rings, vacuum pumps, and prostate massagers. Men avoid these products for the same reason they avoid the doctor. They think needing help means something is wrong with them. It doesn't. Your body at 50 isn't your body at 25, and a tool that works with it is a way to enjoy the body you're in right now, not an admission of failure. I break down what a ring can and can't do (it holds what's already there, it doesn't create it), why your overnight data can be an early warning sign for your vascular health, and the 30-minute rule I repeat every single time. I explain why pumps started in urologists' offices, why going slow matters more than going fast, and why this part of your body really does follow a use-it-or-lose-it rule. Then I get into the prostate, the gland most men ignore, the myth that keeps them from exploring it, and how it can support pelvic health. If there's a man in your life who's been quietly struggling, or just curious, send him this one. ‼️ Join the waitlist for my upcoming coaching program for midlife men HERE. In This Episode: 0:00 – Rings, Pumps & Prostate Massagers 0:09 – Welcome to Taboo to Truth 0:35 – Why Men Avoid These Tools 1:14 – How a Ring Actually Works 1:43 – When to Talk to Your Doctor 2:13 – Beginner Silicone Rings 2:28 – FirmTech: Hook Ring, Tech Ring & Add-On 3:17 – MyHixel & Lasting Longer 3:43 – Ring Options for Couples 3:58 – Ring Safety: The 30-Minute Rule 4:16 – The Ohnut: Comfort for Couples 4:51 – How Vacuum Pumps Work 5:09 – Dr. Joel Kaplan's Clinical Pump 6:02 – Go Slow: Pump Safety 6:23 – Use It or Lose It 6:44 – Bathmate Water Pumps 7:17 – Why Pumps and Rings Work Together 7:28 – Why the Prostate Matters 8:04 – The Myth That Holds Men Back 8:25 – Prostate Massage for Pelvic Health 8:44 – MysteryVibe Molto 9:04 – Aneros: Hands-Free Massagers 9:58 – Patience & Safety Basics 10:19 – Final Thoughts 10:37 – Outro To watch the video version of this episode, head over to YouTube! Shop the products I mention: FirmTech Penis Rings (15% off) with my link: https://myfirmtech.com/karenbigman Couples: Kiiroo's Lux Him/Lux Her or FirmTech's vibrating attachment. Mystery Vibe Molto Prostate Massager (10% off) with Code: TABOO10 Silicone beginner rings (Amazon) MyHixel Pressure-point ring MyHixel Endurance Trainer Ohnut Buffer Rings Dr. Joel Kaplan Vacuum Devices (10% Off) with code TABOO10 Bathmate Penis Pumps (15% off) with code TABOO15 Jim Benson's The Multi-Orgasmic Lover ($50 off using my link) About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Relationship Coach. She tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. On this show, we explore the intricacies of sex in midlife, offering insights and support for all those experiencing this transformative phase. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com

In this episode, I sit down with urologist Dr. Amy Pearlman to talk about what men actually need from their doctors and so rarely get. We start with the urology visit most men dread: why she spends an hour or more just talking before she ever asks for an exam, what a prostate exam actually checks, and why your colonoscopy isn't telling you anything about your prostate. She explains why erectile dysfunction is so much more than a quick questionnaire and a Cialis prescription, and why she sees it as a door into a man's overall health. Then we get into testosterone. Dr. Pearlman explains why she's seeing low T in healthy-looking men in their 20s and 30s, why it's about health and not age, and what testosterone really does for mood, muscle, energy, and brain fog. She shares the question she asks every man before prescribing it, no matter how old he is, why so many men are turning to the black market, and why there's no age at which a man stops being a candidate. Most men have no idea what's actually happening with their erections until something goes wrong. That's why I partnered with FirmTech, a smart ring that tracks your erectile health so you get real data instead of guesswork. Get 15% off at myfirmtech.com/karenbigman ‼️ Join the waitlist for my upcoming coaching program for midlife men HERE. In This Episode: 00:00 – Intro 00:40 – Meet Dr. Amy Pearlman 02:17 – What's a woman's role in men's health? 06:52 – Why men dread the urologist 08:29 – The opt-in exam: what a visit should really feel like 09:55 – The prostate exam, explained (and the colonoscopy myth) 11:38 – Why ED is more than a questionnaire 12:29 – FirmTech 12:58 – When should men start seeing a doctor? 15:27 – The warning signs men shouldn't ignore 16:47 – Why men need a "well man" visit 17:21 – Viagra with no exam: when ED is a warning sign 18:58 – Why testosterone is dropping, even in young men 21:16 – What testosterone actually does 22:41 – The fertility question before any testosterone 24:30 – Black market testosterone and why men go there 25:50 – Is low T the new Viagra? 27:45 – Testosterone after 55: is there an age cutoff? 28:36 – Outro To watch the video version of this episode, head over to YouTube! About The Guest: Dr. Amy Pearlman is a board-certified urologist and fellowship-trained specialist in sexual medicine, male hormonal health, and genitourinary reconstruction. She is the co-founder of Prime Institute in Miami, where she takes a modern, evidence-based approach to optimizing sexual health, hormones, and longevity. A nationally recognized educator and speaker, Dr. Pearlman is passionate about making conversations around sexual health more practical, approachable, and engaging. Her work bridges traditional medicine with emerging therapies and technologies, helping patients better understand their bodies and the growing number of options available to improve sexual function, confidence, and quality of life. Connect with Dr. Amy Pearlman: Website: https://www.primeinstitute.us Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/amypearlmanmd About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Relationship Coach. She tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. On this show, we explore the intricacies of sex in midlife, offering insights and support for all those experiencing this transformative phase. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com MORE LINKS, RESOURCES, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS & FREEBIES! 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

In this episode, I'm talking about testosterone in midlife, menopause, low sex drive, and why so many women on hormone therapy are still missing the one hormone nobody thought to check. I learned this the hard way: after my divorce, I was dating again and having more sex than I had in years, and my pleasure started to disappear, even though I was already taking estrogen and progesterone. It took finding a sexual medicine practice before anyone mentioned testosterone. I use that experience to take apart some of the biggest myths about testosterone. It isn't only a male hormone (when we're younger, women actually make more of it than men). A "normal" result doesn't mean much if your provider doesn't know how to read it. More isn't better. And a men's product at a much smaller dose isn't dangerous when the right clinician prescribes it. I also explain why low T in men builds so slowly that many don't notice it until their 50s and 60s, what men who want children should know before starting treatment, and why testosterone can help a relationship but will never fix one on its own. If you've been told your libido loss is "just menopause" or "just age," this episode gives you the language to go back to your provider and ask better questions. And a friendly reminder: don't take your partner's testosterone. The antidote to a boring sex life isn't trying harder, it's trying something new together — Take the quiz at arya.fyi and use code: TRUTH15 for 15% off their guided intimacy subscription at https://arya.fyi/start?rfsn=8333683.c9f861 In This Episode: 0:00 – Low T Isn't Just a Men's Problem 0:14 – Welcome to Taboo to Truth 0:46 – Testosterone: More Than the "Male" Hormone 1:24 – How Men and Women Make Testosterone 1:56 – How Testosterone Changes as We Age 2:34 – Signs of Low Testosterone in Men 3:30 – Signs of Low Testosterone in Women 3:58 – My Story: Why My Orgasms Stopped 4:23 – It's Not Always Testosterone 4:56 – Total T, Free T & SHBG Explained 6:08 – Why Testing Units and Timing Matter 7:09 – Arya.fyi 7:35 – There's No Magic Number for Women's Desire 8:12 – How Men Are Diagnosed and Treated 9:11 – What Testosterone Can Do for Women 10:02 – Side Effects for Men 10:40 – Side Effects and Dosing for Women 11:24 – Creams, Pellets, Injections & Compounding 12:22 – Off-Label Testosterone for Women 13:41 – Don't Diagnose Yourself: Final Thoughts 14:12 – Final thoughts ‼️ Join the waitlist for my upcoming coaching program for midlife men HERE. To watch the video version of this episode, head over to YouTube! About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Relationship Coach. She tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. On this show, we explore the intricacies of sex in midlife, offering insights and support for all those experiencing this transformative phase. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook. MORE LINKS, RESOURCES, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS & FREEBIES! 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

In this episode, I'm sharing something completely different: a firsthand account of a weekend I had in Montreal. I was there for an Advanced SAR — a Sexual Attitude Reassessment, the kind of training clinicians and sex educators take to get comfortable with behaviors and experiences outside their own — and it happened to land the same weekend as the Montreal Fetish Festival. So I went. I walk through everything, starting with the cabaret show on night one that included flogging and, in a moment that genuinely jarred me. I talk about sitting down with a woman deeply involved in the BDSM community, who explained electric play and needle play to me — including how she experiences needle play as creating art on someone's body, and why the buildup to pain can trigger something called subspace, a genuine chemical shift in the brain. I also get honest about my own reaction as someone who calls herself vanilla: I turn away when someone draws blood, so understanding how pain becomes pleasure for someone else took real effort. I take you inside both a sex club and a kink club for the first time in my life — the gear, the setup, the consent culture, the "vacuum bagging," the group room that turned out to be nothing like what I expected, the St. Andrew's Cross, and the costume culture that included everything from latex and leather to pup play and collaring. Through all of it, my point stays the same: understanding why something is pleasurable for someone else doesn't mean you have to practice it yourself. It just means approaching it with curiosity instead of judgment. In This Episode: 0:00 – The Staple Gun Moment 0:29 – Welcome to Taboo to Truth 0:56 – My Unexpected Path to Becoming a Sex Educator 2:09 – What Is a SAR? Inside the Advanced Class 3:22 – The Vanilla Sex Educator: My Background Before This Weekend 4:32 – Kink Isn't Always About Sex 5:20 – Night One: Cabaret, Flogging & the Staple Gun 6:17 – Curiosity Over Judgment: Talking to the Kink Community 8:31 – Sex Club vs. Kink Club: What's the Difference 10:23 – Inside the Sex Club: Gear, Consent & a Peep Show Surprise 12:14 – Inside the Kink Club: Electric Shocks, Rope & the St. Andrew's Cross 14:22 – The Costume Party: Latex, Pup Play & Collars 15:51 – What I Learned: Curiosity Is Power To watch the video version of this episode, head over to YouTube! ‼️ Join the waitlist for my upcoming coaching program for midlife men HERE. About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Relationship Coach. She tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. On this show, we explore the intricacies of sex in midlife, offering insights and support for all those experiencing this transformative phase. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com LINKS, RESOURCES, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS & FREEBIES! 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

The prostate, also called the male G-spot, is a walnut-sized gland most straight men never want to talk about, and this episode is exactly that conversation. I get into what it does, how it's tied to ejaculation, and why stimulating it can feel intensely pleasurable for some men, regardless of orientation. You'll hear about the three prostate conditions every guy in midlife should know for his prostate health, BPH, prostatitis, and prostate cancer, the real evidence on prostate massage versus the wellness-industry hype, and how to explore it, through the perineum or internally, without ever needing to go through the anus if you don't want to. There's a study linking ejaculation frequency to prostate cancer risk, and the bigger point underneath it all: men's sexual health after 50 doesn't have to start and end with the penis. Enjoy 15% off The TechRing with code TABOO15 using this link: myfirmtech.com/karenbigman In This Episode: 0:00 – Why We're Talking About the Prostate 0:50 – Disclaimer 1:30 – What Exactly Is the Prostate? 2:35 – How the Prostate Participates in Ejaculation 3:15 – Why It's Called the Male G-Spot 4:10 – Why Prostate Stimulation Feels Good (No Orientation Attached) 5:15 – What Can Go Wrong: BPH (Enlarged Prostate) 6:35 – Prostatitis: Infection vs. Chronic Pelvic Pain 7:45 – Prostate Cancer & Why Screening Conversations Matter 8:20 – Does Prostate Massage Actually Help the Prostate? 9:35 – Do You Have to Go Through the Anus? (No — the Perineum) 10:35 – Hygiene, Prep & What to Expect 11:35 – Sponsor: FirmTech 12:05 – How to Massage the Prostate Internally, Step by Step 14:10 – Toys, Safety & What to Avoid 15:00 – When You Should NOT Do a Prostate Massage 15:35 – Ejaculation Frequency & Prostate Cancer Research 16:35 – Expanding Pleasure Beyond the Penis 17:35 – Talking to a Partner Who's Not Interested 18:15 – Final Thoughts Tools In This Episode Worth Exploring The MultiOrgasmic Lover – Use code KBIG50 to save $50 off The Multi-Orgasmic Lover course from Master Sex Coach Jim Benson. MysteryVibe Molto - The Molto prostate massager is a medical-grade silicone, genuinely slim, and built around a malleable core you can shape to your anatomy. The high-frequency vibrations are biomedically engineered to increase blood flow to the pelvic region, which means this isn't just a pleasure device-it's a tissue health tool. Use discount code T2T15 for 15% off. Aneros Vibrating Prostate Massager - The Eupho Syn V is Aneros's vibrating update to its iconic slim, highly mobile prostate massager, offering 10 tuned vibration patterns across 4 speeds plus full functionality in unpowered mode for experienced hands-free play. This product has targeted stimulation and the same nimble profile that lets skilled users work it against the prostate for distinct sensations. ‼️ Join the waitlist for my upcoming coaching program for midlife men HERE. To watch the video version of this episode, head over to YouTube! About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Relationship Coach. She tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. On this show, we explore the intricacies of sex in midlife, offering insights and support for all those experiencing this transformative phase. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook. MORE LINKS, RESOURCES, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS & FREEBIES! 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

In this episode, I'm talking with Alex Grendi, a men's intimacy and confidence coach who spent years quietly numbing his own performance anxiety before he understood what was actually driving it. Alex is a former professional soccer player, and he opens up about carrying performance anxiety into the bedroom long before he ever had sex, shaped almost entirely by porn and movies telling him he'd better be good at it or be humiliated for it. We get into why the confidence he built on the field never carried into intimacy, how getting sober forced him to actually look at how he was showing up with women, and how a friend mentioning a book on Taoist sexuality sent him down the path to becoming a sex coach himself. Alex breaks down the mindset shift, not just the technique, that actually resolves performance anxiety, and we talk candidly about the sexual scripts most men are following without realizing it, why heterosexual sex still gets treated as over the moment the man finishes, and the one question, "can I kiss you?", that changes everything in the bedroom and that almost no one asks. I even share a recent dating experience of my own where I could feel a partner running his script in real time. This is part one of a two-part conversation, so stay close for part two next week. ‼️ Join the waitlist for my upcoming coaching program for midlife men HERE. In This Episode: 0:00 – You're Not the Only One Staying Silent 0:16 – Welcome to Taboo to Truth 0:42 – Meet Alex Grendi, the Men's Intimacy Coach Who Used to Numb It All 1:31 – From Pro Soccer to the Bedroom: Alex's Unlikely Path 2:30 – Where His Performance Anxiety Actually Came From 4:45 – Discovering Taoist Sexuality and What a Sex Coach Actually Is 7:52 – Finding the Courage to Book That First Call 9:30 – The Real Fix Isn't a Technique, It's a Mindset Shift 10:49 – Newsletter 11:08 – Why Field Confidence Never Transferred to the Bedroom 12:06 – The Sexual Script: Why Men Think They're Supposed to Already Know 13:39 – Karen's Own Story: Shutting Down When a Partner Ran His Script 14:51 – Why "Can I Kiss You?" Is the Sexiest Question a Man Can Ask 17:30 – Teaching Men to Lead by Asking, Not Assuming 19:23 – Part Two Is Coming To watch the video version of this episode, head over to YouTube! About The Guest: Alex Grendi is a men's intimacy and confidence coach who helps men reconnect with their bodies, expand their capacity for pleasure, and build deeper emotional and physical connection with their partners. His coaching blends ancient practices, practical exercises, and a simple step-by-step process, supported by direct guidance and a community of men on the same journey. Alex's work empowers men to move past shame, rebuild self-trust, and create meaningful, lasting intimacy in their relationships. Connect with Alex Grendi: Website: https://www.alexgrendi.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/alex.grendi YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@Alex.Grendi About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Relationship Coach. She tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. On this show, we explore the intricacies of sex in midlife, offering insights and support for all those experiencing this transformative phase. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook. LINKS, RESOURCES, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS & FREEBIES 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

In this episode, I'm kicking off season 7 — and marking 200 episodes of Taboo to Truth — with one of the topics that comes up in my practice more than almost anything else: sexless marriages. From the outside, a relationship can look completely fine — you're raising kids, running a household, laughing together — while almost nothing is happening behind the bedroom door, sometimes for months or years. I break down five real reasons marriages and long-term relationships go sexless, and why it's almost never as simple as losing attraction. I start with what happens when one partner shuts the conversation down completely rather than simply saying no to sex in the moment, and how that silence lets both partners write their own, often painful, story about what it means. I get into the mental load that quietly kills desire, in women and in men, and why "why don't you want me?" is usually the wrong question to ask. I talk about what it looks like when someone has lost touch with their own erotic identity so completely they can't answer what turns them on anymore, and why exploration, not pressure, is the way back in. I also get honest about porn, sex toys, and AI companionship: when they expand a sex life versus when they quietly start to replace it, and what I call the "secret garden," the private sexual world a partner can build without the other ever knowing. I close with why the sex talk can never be a one-time conversation, my framework for balanced sexuality — sensation, relationship, and fantasy — and why a sexless relationship is not automatically a loveless or a doomed one. ‼️ Join the waitlist for my upcoming coaching program for midlife men HERE. In This Episode: 0:00 – When Sex Just Stops 0:38 – Welcome to Season 7: Today's Topic, Sexless Marriages 1:20 – What Sexless Looks Like From the Outside 1:52 – Consent, Entitlement & Why This Still Matters 2:19 – Reason 1: When One Partner Shuts Down the Conversation 4:07 – Reason 2: Mental Load, Stress & Hormonal Changes 5:39 – Reason 2 Continued: Low Desire in Men 6:31 – Reason 3: Losing Touch With Your Own Pleasure 7:30 – Exploring Desire Without Pressure + Sponsor: ARIA 8:44 – Reason 4: Porn & Sex Toys as a Crutch 9:54 – Reason 4 Continued: AI Companionship & Intimacy 10:39 – Reason 5: Treating the Sex Talk as a One-Time Conversation 11:16 – Why Sexual Communication Has to Be Ongoing 12:32 – The Balanced Sexuality Framework 13:40 – Sexless Doesn't Mean Loveless: Final Thoughts 14:11 – Final thoughts To watch the video version of this episode, head over to YouTube! 🔗 The antidote to a boring sex life isn't trying harder, it's trying something new together — Take the quiz at arya.fyi and use code: TRUTH15 for 15% off their guided intimacy subscription at https://arya.fyi/start?rfsn=8333683.c9f861 About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Relationship Coach. She tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. On this show, we explore the intricacies of sex in midlife, offering insights and support for all those experiencing this transformative phase. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook. LINKS, RESOURCES, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS & FREEBIES 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

In part two of my conversation with men's coach Mike Elliott, we get into how couples actually reconnect and rebuild intimacy after a sexless marriage, low desire, or years of disconnection in midlife. Mike walks me through the nervous system work, attachment science, and couples practice he uses to help men move past shame and disconnection in their relationship. Part two is where Mike gives us the actual practice. If you haven't watched part one yet, start there, since everything here builds on it directly. Mike walks me through his golden rule: move at the pace of connection, not the pace of friction. We get specific about what that looks like between two people, breathing together, gazing at each other before anything else happens, slowing down instead of rushing toward the end goal, and why so many men only find their way into this work once a marriage is already breaking. He talks about the "little boy" still running the show in a lot of grown men, why erectile difficulty is almost never really about the body, and why he believes healing happens in proximity to other men who've already done the work themselves. We also get into why a sexless marriage is never one partner's problem to fix alone, what happens to a relationship once the early hormone rush fades around the 18-month mark, and the "we language" Mike and his partner Courtney built their entire practice around. I close it out with my three rapid-fire questions: his definition of sex, his best orgasm, and the one fantasy he hasn't lived out yet. In This Episode: 0:00 – The Six-Figure Life With a Silent Bedroom 0:10 – Welcome to Taboo to Truth 0:36 – Welcome Back to Part Two 1:32 – The Golden Rule: Move at the Pace of Connection, Not Friction 4:25 – Why Sex Is the Most Vulnerable Place We Go 5:10 – Radical Transparency: How Men Actually Start This Work 8:55 – When She Feels His Energy Leaking Somewhere Else 9:43 – It's Never a "You Problem," It's a "We Problem" 11:16 – The Honeymoon Hormones (And Why the Real Work Starts After) 12:16 – Learning "We Work": Moving Toward Instead of Pulling Away 13:49 – Can You Really Stay With One Person for Life? 14:33 – The Sacred We: Building a Language for the Long Haul 17:30 – Sacred Relationship and the Maturity That Creates Real Attraction 18:50 – Mike's Closing Advice: Pace of Connection, Not Pace of Ambition 20:53 – Three Rapid-Fire Questions: Sex, Best Orgasm & Unfulfilled Fantasy 23:07 – Where to Find Mike & Wrap-Up To watch the video version of this episode, head over to YouTube! 🔗 The antidote to a boring sex life isn't trying harder, it's trying something new together — Take the quiz at arya.fyi and use code: TRUTH15 for 15% off their guided intimacy subscription at https://arya.fyi/start?rfsn=8333683.c9f861 ‼️ Join the waitlist for my upcoming coaching program for midlife men HERE. About The Guest: Mike Elliott is a Relational Leadership Mentor and Men's Initiation Guide, working with men who want to have it all. He guides them to lead with Relational Authority™—anchored in initiation, integration, and inspiration. Having been adopted twice and walked through the dark night of divorce, he rebuilt his life from the inside out. Now co-host of "The Sacred We," he helps men transform their relationships—starting with themselves—and create legacies of love, presence, and purpose. Connect with Mike Elliott: Website: www.itsmikeelliott.com Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/mikeelliott.relating/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/itsmikeelliott YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@thetogetherpodcast The Sacred We Podcast: https://open.spotify.com/show/7EqHPtL9DovzPtazag8QO1?si About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Relationship Coach. She tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. On this show, we explore the intricacies of sex in midlife, offering insights and support for all those experiencing this transformative phase. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com LINKS, RESOURCES, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS & FREEBIES 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

Chronic sexual rejection in a relationship doesn't just cause hurt feelings, it rewires how a person feels about themselves, their body, and their worth. In this episode I break down what's actually happening in the nervous system when a partner is turned down again and again, why rejection activates some of the same brain regions involved in physical pain, and how "not tonight" starts to feel like proof you're not wanted. I get into the real difference between a mutual dry spell and a unilateral shutdown, why low desire is never manipulation, and how weaponizing intimacy is a distinct and more damaging pattern. Then I trace the predictable spiral: pursue, withdraw, keep score, and eventually contempt — which Gottman identifies as the clearest warning sign a relationship is breaking down. I close with what actually helps: small daily check-ins instead of relationship summits, physical affection with genuinely no expectation attached, and letting go of the idea that fixing your sex life means going back to exactly how it used to be. In This Episode: 0:00 – The Man Who Kept a Rejection Chart 0:14 – Welcome to Taboo to Truth 0:32 – Today's Topic: When Intimacy Quietly Disappears 1:19 – Consent, Entitlement & Why This Still Hurts 2:09 – The Nervous System's Response to Rejection 2:47 – The Pursue-Withdraw Cycle Begins 3:48 – What Rejection Really Asks: Am I Wanted? 5:09 – Touch, Oxytocin & the Stress Spiral 6:04 – Consent vs. Weaponized Intimacy 8:04 – Criticism, Contempt & the Four Horsemen 9:39 – Sponsor Break: ARIA 10:01 – The Other Side: Why the Lower-Desire Partner Shuts Down 11:32 – Rebuilding Starts Here: The Daily Check-In 13:00 – Rebuilding: Affection With No Expectation 14:08 – Redefining Intimacy for Who You Are Now 15:39 – When to Get Outside Help, Final Thoughts & Outro To watch the video version of this episode, head over to YouTube! 🔗 The antidote to a boring sex life isn't trying harder, it's trying something new together — Take the quiz at arya.fyi and use code: TRUTH15 for 15% off their guided intimacy subscription at https://arya.fyi/start?rfsn=8333683.c9f861 ‼️ Join the waitlist for my upcoming coaching program for midlife men HERE. About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Relationship Coach. She tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. On this show, we explore the intricacies of sex in midlife, offering insights and support for all those experiencing this transformative phase. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com LINKS, RESOURCES, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS & FREEBIES 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

Every conversation about a sexless marriage gets pointed at the woman. Low desire, hormones, resentment, the mental load, she's the one who's supposed to explain herself. Nobody asks what happens on the other side of the bed, and today I sat down with men's coach Mike Elliott to find out. Mike works with high-performing men who look successful on paper and feel quietly disconnected underneath. In this conversation we get into why she rejects him and he assumes she doesn't want sex anymore, when the real story is closer to this: she doesn't feel seen, and her body has been scanning for safety the whole time. We talk about the difference between yang sex and yin sex, the exact instruction Mike gives every man he coaches (slow down, three times), and why a man who can't hold his own feelings can't hold hers either. Mike also gets personal. He tells me about the night in Whistler when he lost his erection with his own partner and spiraled into a shame he'd been avoiding his whole adult life, and what happened when she refused to let him run from it. If you have ever gone quiet in your own marriage, present in the house and absent in the relationship, this conversation names exactly what's happening in his body and gives you language for it. Part two is coming, so stay close. Join the waitlist for my upcoming coaching program for midlife men HERE. In This Episode: 0:00 – He's Not Pursuing Her, He's Pressuring Her 0:10 – Welcome to Taboo to Truth 0:37 – Today's Topic: The Sexless Marriage Conversation From His Side 1:35 – Why This Exact Fight Keeps Happening 4:32 – What's Really Happening When She Rejects Him 6:52 – Yang Sex vs. Yin Sex: Why Men Default to Friction 9:53 – The Pushback: Masculine Enough vs. Emotionally Available 13:15 – It's Not a Libido Problem, It's a Polarity Problem 13:47 – Why Men Want the Quick Fix: Give Me the Pill 14:49 – Mike's Story: Chasing "More" Instead of Feeling More 16:53 – The Whistler Story: Losing His Erection Mid-Intimacy 19:08 – The Shame Spiral and the Moment He Stopped Running 20:51 – Holding the Shame: How His Body Finally Let Go 22:23 – Wrap-Up: Part Two Is Coming To watch the video version of this episode, head over to YouTube! About The Guest: Mike Elliott is a Relational Leadership Mentor and Men's Initiation Guide, working with men who want to have it all. He guides them to lead with Relational Authority™—anchored in initiation, integration, and inspiration. Having been adopted twice and walked through the dark night of divorce, he rebuilt his life from the inside out. Now co-host of "The Sacred We," he helps men transform their relationships—starting with themselves—and create legacies of love, presence, and purpose. Connect with Mike Elliott: Website: www.itsmikeelliott.com Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/mikeelliott.relating/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/itsmikeelliott YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@thetogetherpodcast The Sacred We Podcast: https://open.spotify.com/show/7EqHPtL9DovzPtazag8QO1?si About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Relationship Coach. She tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. On this show, we explore the intricacies of sex in midlife, offering insights and support for all those experiencing this transformative phase. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com LINKS, RESOURCES, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS & FREEBIES 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

Dating after divorce isn't a downgrade. It's the first time you get to pick a partner with your eyes wide open, and that's exactly what I'm digging into this episode. I walk through what's genuinely different about dating in midlife: the full history you're carrying, the fact that your intentions have shifted from figuring yourself out to actually knowing what you want, and why a smaller dating pool raises the stakes on every single date. I get into my biggest pet peeve, texting standing in for real conversation, the physical changes that change how intimacy actually works, and why the terrain feels rougher this time, from rebuilding a social circle from scratch to navigating kids, exes, and logistics that never existed the first time around. I also get into the part nobody prepares you for: dating later in life comes with real advantages. No ticking clock. No pressure. The ability to filter for character instead of potential, because you've watched enough people over enough decades to spot the patterns early. And a bonus round of tips for anyone braving the apps, including the photos that help you and the ones that hurt you. If you're dating after divorce right now, approach it with excitement instead of fear. Yes, there are moments that suck. There are also more moments of meeting new people, learning new things, and trying activities you never would have imagined earlier in life. Join the waitlist for my upcoming coaching program for midlife men HERE. In This Episode: 0:00 – Dating After Divorce Isn't a Downgrade 0:09 – Welcome to Taboo to Truth 0:24 – Today's Topic: What's Really Different About Dating After Divorce 0:57 – Full History, New Intentions & a Smaller Pool 1:59 – More Baggage, Texting & Physical Changes 2:47 – Why the Terrain Feels Rougher (Rebuilding, Grief & Logistics) 3:43 – Newsletter Break 4:00 – Rejection Hits Different — Then the Real Advantages 4:34 – Filtering for Character, Better Sex & Choosing Connection 5:11 – Bonus: Online Dating & Profile Tips 6:38 – Approach It With Excitement To watch the video version of this episode, head over to YouTube! About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook. LINKS, RESOURCES, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS & FREEBIES 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

Part two picks up right where we left off, and this time I get into the parts of ethical non-monogamy most people never actually see. Ali walks me through the sex-positive spaces she has spent years exploring: a private sex club in Montreal, an underground play party in Mexico, and a temple space in Europe that she calls her best experience yet. We get into what actually happens inside these spaces: the consent rules, the safety measures, what it costs, and what it feels like to say no over and over again as a single woman in the room. Ali also answers my three rapid-fire questions, including her definition of sex, her best orgasm, and a fantasy she has never acted on. This conversation is not about convincing anyone to try any of this. It is about showing you what these spaces actually look like once you strip away the assumptions, so you can decide for yourself what curiosity means to you. In This Episode: 0:00 – Recap: Picking Up Where We Left Off 0:38 – Karen's Curiosity About Sex Parties 2:06 – Inside a Sex Club: Rules and Layout 5:33 – Consent Mechanics in the Orgy Room 6:15 – Ali and Her Partner's Night at the Club 8:54 – Her First Private Play Party in Mexico 12:21 – How Consent Gets Set at a Play Party 13:52 – The Temple Space: Her Best Experience Yet 17:03 – The Desire-Sharing Circle 18:09 – Is It All BDSM? And What It Costs 20:55 – Safety and Security at These Events 22:29 – Her Advice Before You Go 24:26 – Advice for Men: Handling Rejection 25:13 – You Don't Have to Do Anything 26:19 – Three Rapid-Fire Questions 29:06 – Where to Find Ali & Final Thoughts About The Guest: Ali is a content creator, sex education student, and host of a YouTube channel exploring sex, relationships, pleasure, intimacy, and alternative lifestyles. Through candid conversations, travel experiences, and educational content, she helps normalize discussions around sexuality while encouraging curiosity, critical thinking, and self-discovery. Her work focuses on reducing shame, challenging assumptions, and creating space for nuanced conversations about pleasure, relationships, and the many ways people choose to live and love. Connect with Ali Imperiale: Website: https://aliimperiale.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/aliimperiale YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@aliimperiale About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com LINKS, RESOURCES, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS & FREEBIES 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

Everyone pictures the same scene when they think about mismatched desire: he's reaching, she's pulling away. I want you to picture the opposite couple today, the ones where she's the one lying in bed hoping and he's the one already half asleep. That reversal comes with a specific kind of shame nobody names out loud. She starts wondering if she's too much. He starts wondering if something is wrong with his masculinity. Neither one chose that script, and neither one did anything wrong by living inside it. I'm walking through why the old idea that men are simply wired to want more sex doesn't hold up under real research, what's actually driving a lower desire partner's pullback in midlife (stress, exhaustion, hormones, and a wiring difference most couples never learn), and the real reason this dynamic quietly wrecks relationships. Spoiler: it's never the gap itself. It's the silence around it. If you've been in this exact bed, at this exact hour, wondering what's wrong with you or with your partner, this episode gives you the plain, unfiltered picture, and a real way to talk about it. In This Episode: 0:00 – The Assumption We Never Question 0:09 – Welcome to Taboo to Truth 0:29 – Picture This: Who's Really Reaching in Bed? 1:20 – Mismatched Desire Is Normal, Not a Red Flag 1:51 – The Untold Twist: When She Wants It More 2:13 – Debunking the "Men Just Want More" Myth 4:12 – The Shame Loop: Her Side and His Side 6:03 – What's Really Driving the Gap 6:34 – Silence Is the Real Relationship Killer 7:05 – The Reframe: What Do You Actually Need? 7:45 – Closing Thoughts, CTA & Sign-Off To watch the video version of this episode, head over to YouTube! About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook. LINKS, RESOURCES, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS & FREEBIES 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

Open relationships get a bad reputation. People hear "ethical non-monogamy" and assume it's a free pass to cheat, or a fantasy dressed up with a fancier name. I sat down with Ali Imperiale, who documents her open relationship and sex-positive travels for her audience, and she walked me through what actually happens when two people agree to rewrite the rules together. We get into the real version of ethical non-monogamy: the renegotiating, the boundary that got crossed, the sex therapist she called in, and the moment she developed feelings for someone outside her primary relationship and had to figure out what that meant. Ali is candid about the difference between a fantasy threesome and an actual one, including her first experience and the surprise threesome she planned for her partner's birthday.. This conversation strips the shame off every part of it: the labels, the logistics, the awkward moments. If you have ever been curious about non-monogamy, polyamory, or what a threesome actually looks like, this episode gives you the plain, unfiltered picture. Part two is coming, so stay close. NOTE: Due to technical difficulties during recording, the audio and video quality in this episode may vary from our usual standard. We appreciate your understanding and hope you enjoy the conversation nonetheless. In This Episode: 0:00 – Open Relationships Aren't a Free Pass to Cheat 0:30 – Meet Ali Imperiale: Sex-Positive Storyteller 1:11 – Talking About Sex Without Being Explicit 5:04 – From Monogamous to Ethically Non-Monogamous: Ali's Story 7:22 – Meeting Gab and Opening Up Together 10:15 – Values Over Rules: Renegotiating as a Couple 13:19 – Lessons Learned: Communication and Sex Therapy 17:36 – When Feelings Get Complicated 19:44 – Polyamory, Labels, and Loving More Than One Person 22:44 – The Nitty Gritty: Her First Threesome, a Viral Hawaii Story 28:58 – Gab's First Threesome: A COVID Birthday Surprise 30:35 – Setting Boundaries and Performance Anxiety 34:11 – Why Aftercare Matters 36:43 – Wrap-Up: Part Two Is Coming To watch the video version of this episode, head over to YouTube! About The Guest: Ali is a content creator, sex education student, and host of a YouTube channel exploring sex, relationships, pleasure, intimacy, and alternative lifestyles. Through candid conversations, travel experiences, and educational content, she helps normalize discussions around sexuality while encouraging curiosity, critical thinking, and self-discovery. Her work focuses on reducing shame, challenging assumptions, and creating space for nuanced conversations about pleasure, relationships, and the many ways people choose to live and love. Connect with Ali Imperiale: Website: https://aliimperiale.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/aliimperiale YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@aliimperiale About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com LINKS, RESOURCES, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS & FREEBIES 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

If you're exhausted, your gut is expanding, your motivation is gone, and your sex drive has quietly disappeared, someone has probably told you it's male menopause. In this episode of Taboo To Truth, I explain why the term Male Menopause isn't medically accurate, how men's hormonal aging differs from women's, what low testosterone actually feels like versus what just looks like it, and when a symptom deserves a doctor instead of a supplement. I get into the research on testosterone replacement therapy, the difference between libido and erectile function, the tools I recommend for supporting sexual function, and what happens in a relationship when desire changes and nobody talks about it. Your sexuality isn't controlled by one number on a blood test, and getting older doesn't mean the end of desire, pleasure, or satisfying sex. In This Episode: 00:00 Intro 00:13 Welcome to Taboo to Truth 00:35 What We're Covering Today 01:41 Does Male Menopause Actually Exist? 03:22 Male vs. Female Hormonal Aging 04:30 What Low Testosterone Actually Feels Like 05:42 Other Causes That Mimic "Male Menopause" 06:46 Testosterone, Desire & the 2017 Trials 08:24 Libido vs. Erections: Two Different Systems 09:51 Tools That Support Sexual Function 11:27 How This Affects Your Relationship 12:37 When to See a Doctor 13:44 How Low T Is Actually Diagnosed 15:06 TRT: Benefits & Risks 16:49 What Else You Can Do 18:17 So... Does Male Menopause Exist? 19:05 Final Thoughts & Where to Learn More To watch the video version of this episode, head over to YouTube! Products mentioned: FirmTech Tech Ring – tracks nocturnal/spontaneous erections overnight to give you data on erectile function (not a diagnostic tool, but useful info to bring to a doctor). https://myfirmtech.com/ Dr. Joel Kaplan's Pump – a vacuum erection device (penis pump), affiliate link mentioned. https://drjoelkaplan.com/affiliate/affiliates/ Bathmate's Pump – a water-based penis pump, affiliate link mentioned. Use code TABOO15 for 15% off at https://bathmatedirect.com/ MysteryVibe Tenuto 2 – a wearable vibrator that provides stimulation for both partners during sex, especially helpful when erections need more direct stimulation. Use code TABOO10 for 10% off at https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF Uberlube – a lubricant recommended for comfort during sex. https://uberlube.com/ 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook. Research/ Sources * [American Urological Association: Testosterone Deficiency Guideline](https://www.auanet.org/guidelines-and-quality/guidelines/testosterone-deficiency-guideline) * [Endocrine Society: Testosterone Therapy for Hypogonadism](https://www.endocrine.org/clinical-practice-guidelines/testosterone-therapy) * [Mayo Clinic: Male Menopause—Myth or Reality?](https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/mens-health/in-depth/male-menopause/art-20048056) * [National Institute on Aging: Testosterone Trials—Mixed Results](https://www.nia.nih.gov/news/nih-supported-trials-testosterone-therapy-older-men-report-mixed-results) * [FDA: 2025 Testosterone Labeling Changes](https://www.fda.gov/drugs/drug-alerts-and-statements/fda-issues-class-wide-labeling-changes-testosterone-products) * [New England Journal of Medicine: Cardiovascular Safety of Testosterone Therapy](https://www.nejm.org/doi/full/10.1056/NEJMoa2215025) * [National Institute on Aging: Sexualipjurnd Intimacy in Older Adults](https://www.nia.nih.gov/health/sexuality/sexuality-and-intimacy-older-adults)

In part two of my conversation with Susan Bratton and Karl Eberhardt, we go even deeper into what actually holds a non-monogamous relationship together. We talk about why communication can make or break an open relationship, what Karl learned about himself after six years of practicing polyamory, and the concept they call "Team Sweetie" — showing up for each other through illness, grief, and everything in between. Susan shares her free "Alchemy of Intimacy" guide for couples considering this kind of relationship, and we get into the practical side of staying safe: their fluid-bonded screening process, the STI most people have never heard of, and why standard insurance testing doesn't catch everything. We close with what it really means to love your partners through their mistakes. In This Episode: 0:00 – Welcome Back: Picking Up Where We Left Off 0:24 – Intro: Redefining Life & Sex After 50 0:46 – Why Good Communication Makes (or Breaks) an Open Relationship 3:35 – Six Years In: What Polyamory Taught Karl About Himself 4:59 – "Team Sweetie": Showing Up for Each Other Through Crisis 7:15 – Susan's Advice: The Alchemy of Intimacy & 10 Rules for Success 8:45 – Karl's Advice: Build the Framework Before You Open Up 10:23 – The Screening Document: Where New Partners Start 11:07 – Inside the STI Testing Protocol: Mycoplasma, Incubation Periods & Protex Health 14:00 – Nobody's Perfect: Loving Your Partners Through Mistakes 15:08 – The Testing Gap: Why Insurance Won't Screen for Herpes 17:09 – Final Takeaways To watch the video version of this episode, head over to YouTube! Testing before getting physical is non-negotiable for me — ProDx Health makes it easy. First PASS-certified at-home STI kit, herpes testing included. 15% off: http://prodxhealth.com/discount/taboo 📩 Want more real talk on sex, dating, and relationships after 50 delivered straight to your inbox? Join my newsletter: https://www.taboototruth.com/subscribe About the Guests: Susan is a champion and advocate for all those who desire ageless intimacy. She is a best-selling author and publisher of 44 books and programs including S*xual Soulmates, Relationship Magic, Revive Her Drive, Ravish Him and many more. She’s the official company spokesperson for GAINSWave® and The Dr. Joel Kaplan Company. She serves as Chief Advocacy Officer of ProDxHealth.org STI testing. Susan has been a featured guest on over 1,000 podcasts and TV shows, including Diary of a CEO, You Are Not Broken, S*x with Emily, The Human Upgrade with Dave Asprey, Good Moms Bad Choices, Heal Thyself, IDIOT with Laura Clery, The Infamous “Clit Camp” Music Video, LuvBites with Dr. Tara, and The Chalene Show. Her books and interviews have helped millions take control of their s*xual joy. Her message resonates across gender and age because it’s rooted in agency, body literacy, and connection. Connect with Susan Bratton: Website: https://susanbratton.com https://tenintimacy.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/susanbratton Karl Eberhardt is a nationally recognized New Car Owner Trainer on correct care of modern car paint finishes. Karl has a life long passion for design and is the brewer of beer//Cicerone CBS, and custom jewelry. He has built surfboards for 25+ years. Connect with Karl Ebhardt: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karleberhardt_ About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com LINKS, RESOURCES, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS & FREEBIES 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

I'm tackling one of the most avoided conversations in long-term relationships: how to actually bring up sex with your partner. In this episode, I break down why this conversation feels so impossible — the shame, the missing communication skills, the fear of rejection — and I hand you exact scripts to use instead of the accusatory lines that shut your partner down before you even start. I walk through how to open "the conversation about the conversation," deeper questions to ask once you're talking, and what to do if you get shut down. Couples with better sex lives have better, longer-lasting relationships, and this episode gives you the words to get there. The antidote to a boring sex life isn't trying harder, it's trying something new together — Take the quiz at arya.fyi and use code: TRUTH15 for 15% off their guided intimacy subscription at https://arya.fyi/start?rfsn=8333683.c9f861 In This Episode: 0:00 – The Words to Use 0:14 – Welcome to Taboo to Truth 0:40 – The Slow Fade: When You Stop Noticing Each Other 1:15 – Reframing It: This Isn't Really About Sex 1:45 – Why the Conversation Is So Hard 2:20 – The Lines That Put Your Partner on the Defensive 2:55 – Language Shifts: What to Say Instead 3:45 – The 3 Rules: Curiosity, "I" Statements, Tone 4:15 – Subscribe + Grab the Pleasure Playbook 4:35 – Starting "The Conversation About the Conversation" 5:30 – Going Deeper: Questions to Reconnect 6:05 – If You Get Shut Down (And When to Get Help) 6:25 – Final Thought: Better Sex, Better Relationships To watch the video version of this episode, head over to YouTube! About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com LINKS, RESOURCES, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS & FREEBIES 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

Non-monogamy is one of the topics I get asked about more than almost anything else, so in this episode I sit down with Susan Bratton and Karl Eberhardt to dig into what open relationships, polyamory, and relationship anarchy actually look like day to day — not the theory, the lived experience. We talk about how to know you're ready to open a relationship, the STI screening protocol that makes it work, how jealousy and compersion actually show up, and the moment a 35-year marriage nearly ended over what gets called "husband thievery." We also get into how an adult daughter found out her parents were non-monogamous in one short conversation, and how a "summer boy toy" earned a promotion to full-time boyfriend. Whether you're curious, skeptical, or already living this life, this conversation is going to challenge some assumptions. Mentioned in this episode: Testing before getting physical is non-negotiable for me — ProDx Health makes it easy. First PASS-certified at-home STI kit, herpes testing included. 15% off: http://prodxhealth.com/discount/taboo In This Episode: 0:00 – Redefining Relationships in Midlife 0:28 – Welcome to Taboo to Truth 0:52 – Meet Susan Bratton & Karl Eberhardt 2:25 – Defining Non-Monogamy vs. Cheating: The Relationship Tree 7:29 – How Susan Knew She Was Ready to Open Her Marriage 8:25 – How Karl and Susan Met (The Pool Story) 12:02 – Why Karl Is "Well-Suited" for Polyamory 14:34 – The Non-Negotiable: STI Testing & Screening In 15:39 – "Polyamory Means Love Many": Susan's Two Love Relationships 17:27 – Karl's San Diego Girlfriend & Traveling as a Throuple 19:59 – What Is a "Bambi"? A Different Kind of Intimacy 21:26 – Susan's Young Lover & the Jealousy That Followed 23:57 – Karl's Turn: Facing Jealousy Over an Old Flame 26:29 – Compersion, Husband Thievery & Almost Losing Tim 29:44 – Telling Their Daughter Taylor 31:11 – From "Summer Boy Toy" to Full-Time Boyfriend 34:05 – Outro To watch the video version of this episode, head over to YouTube! About The Guest: Susan is a champion and advocate for all those who desire ageless intimacy. She is a best-selling author and publisher of 44 books and programs including S*xual Soulmates, Relationship Magic, Revive Her Drive, Ravish Him and many more. She’s the official company spokesperson for GAINSWave® and The Dr. Joel Kaplan Company. She serves as Chief Advocacy Officer of ProDxHealth.org STI testing. Susan has been a featured guest on over 1,000 podcasts and TV shows, including Diary of a CEO, You Are Not Broken, S*x with Emily, The Human Upgrade with Dave Asprey, Good Moms Bad Choices, Heal Thyself, IDIOT with Laura Clery, The Infamous “Clit Camp” Music Video, LuvBites with Dr. Tara, and The Chalene Show. Her books and interviews have helped millions take control of their s*xual joy. Her message resonates across gender and age because it’s rooted in agency, body literacy, and connection. Connect with Susan Bratton: Website: https://susanbratton.com Mentioned in this episode: https://tenintimacy.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/susanbratton Karl Eberhardt is a nationally recognized New Car Owner Trainer on correct care of modern car paint finishes. Karl has a life long passion for design and is the brewer of beer//Cicerone CBS, and custom jewelry. He has built surfboards for 25+ years. Connect with Karl Ebhardt: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karleberhardt_/ About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

The reason your marriage is sexless has nothing to do with sex. If you think a lack of intimacy in your relationship is a sex problem, I need you to hear this — it's almost never about the bedroom. In this episode, I break down emotional availability: what it really means, why so many good, hardworking, faithful men struggle with it, and how childhood shapes the way we handle conflict as adults. I explain the biology behind emotional shutdown, walk through attachment styles — secure, anxious, avoidant, and fearful-avoidant — and show why emotional safety is the real path to physical intimacy for most women. Then I give you five practical shifts to become more emotionally reachable, plus real scripts you can use tonight. This isn't about blame. It's about understanding the blueprint you were handed — so you can build something better. Join the waitlist for my upcoming coaching program for midlife men: https://taboototruth.wixforms.com/f/7424226439106397420 In This Episode: 0:00 - Cold Open: "It's Almost Never About the Bedroom" 0:20 - Welcome to Taboo to Truth 1:05 - The Emotionally Unavailable Man: What Today's Episode Covers 2:15 - "He's a Great Guy, But I Can't Get Close to Him" 3:45 - What Emotional Availability Actually Means 5:30 - Real Examples: What He Says vs. What She Hears 7:15 - How Boys Are Taught to Suppress Emotion 9:15 - The Biology of Shutdown: Flooding, Adrenaline & the Amygdala 11:00 - What Are You Really Protecting? 12:00 - Attachment Styles: Secure, Anxious, Avoidant & Fearful-Avoidant 15:30 - Your Brain Can Change: Neuroplasticity Explained 16:45 - Why Sexless Marriages Are Rarely About Sex 19:00 - The 5 Shifts to Become Emotionally Available 21:15 - Real Scripts: What to Say Instead 22:10 - The Client Story: "I Thought I Had a Sex Problem" 22:35 - Final Thoughts & Coaching Waitlist Want a deeper look? Watch the full episode on YouTube for a more visual experience of today’s discussion. LINKS, RESOURCES, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS & FREEBIES 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com

Most men would rather suffer in silence than admit they have a problem in the bedroom —Let’s change that. On this episode of Taboo To Truth, I sat down with Jeff Abraham, CEO of Promescent, to talk about one of the most common yet least discussed issues in men's sexual health: premature ejaculation. We get into the real clinical definition of PE, why the "arousal gap" between men and women makes this a near-universal issue, and why anxiety — not selfishness — is usually driving the problem. Jeff breaks down the physiological and psychological causes of PE, why shame keeps so many men from seeking help, and why over 4,000 doctors recommend Promescent's Delay Spray. We also cover how the product actually works, how to use it correctly, dosing and titration, safety data from 3 million bottles sold, and how it compares to Viagra. Jeff gets personal too, sharing his own story of turning 69, how porn distorts expectations for young men, and the reality of the refractory period as we age. We close out talking about female pleasure, non-ejaculatory orgasms, and why using every tool available in the bedroom is nothing to be ashamed of. This is a candid, funny, and genuinely useful conversation for any man — or any partner of a man — who wants better sex and less anxiety about it. Use this link for 15% off Delay Spray: https://promescent.sjv.io/QY44bY In This Episode: 00:00 — The Silent Struggle Millions of Men Face 00:33 — Podcast Intro & Meet Your Host 01:05 — Welcome Jeff Abraham, CEO of Promescent 02:10 — What Really Counts as Premature Ejaculation 04:15 — The Arousal Gap & Why Anxiety Kills Intimacy 06:45 — Physical vs. Psychological Causes of PE 09:00 — Breaking the Stigma Around Men's Sexual Health 11:00 — Kegels, Combo Therapy & Why Urologists Trust Promescent 14:00 — The Old (Bad) Solutions: SSRIs and Numbing Creams 16:30 — Treating PE Step by Step & Weaning Off 19:30 — How Jeff Discovered Promescent (Origin Story) 22:30 — The Eutectic Formula That Changes Everything 25:00 — How to Use the Delay Spray: Application & Timing 27:30 — Dosing, Titration & Finding Your Sweet Spot 29:30 — Is It Safe? 3 Million Bottles, Zero Red Flags 31:00 — Promescent vs. Viagra & Doctors' Favorite Combo 33:30 — Does Age or Ethnicity Affect PE Rates? 35:15 — The PE-ED Connection & the Fragile Male Ego 37:00 — Jeff's Personal Story: Aging, Porn & Regret 38:30 — Where to Find Promescent, Discount Code To watch the video version of this episode, head over to YouTube! About the Guest: Jeff Abraham is the CEO of Promescent, a leading sexual wellness brand focused on making intimacy solutions more accessible and effective. After discovering a groundbreaking treatment for premature ejaculation developed by urologist Dr. Ronald Gilbert, Jeff invested in the product and became the majority owner, launching the company’s flagship Delay Spray. Connect with Jeff Abraham: Website: https://www.promescent.com Instagram: https://www.facebook.com/Promescent/ Delay Spray: https://promescent.sjv.io/QY44bY About the host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com Want more Taboo To Truth? Join the community HERE LINKS, RESOURCES, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS & FREEBIES 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

👉 Understand Menopause and save your sex life with the Man's Menopause Handbook: https://www.taboototruth.com/enroll/menmeetmenopause 🔥 Spice things up and get creative with arya.fyi Intimacy Concierge (code TRUTH15 for 15% off) 46% of men watch porn intentionally every week — and I'd bet that number's low, since it only counts the people who admit it. In this updated solo episode, I'm not asking whether you watch porn. I'm asking what you're watching, and what it might be quietly doing to your sex life. I break down what "ethical porn" actually means (informed consent, fair pay, transparency), how mainstream free porn like Pornhub is built around a heterosexual male gaze with real consent and theft problems baked in, and why that content is quietly distorting expectations for midlife couples specifically. I connect the dots between porn consumption and real intimacy avoidance, unpack why midlife bodies can't and shouldn't compete with porn-fantasy bodies, and lay out what changes — for your body, your partner, and your relationship — when you switch to ethically produced content. No shame, no guilt, just an invitation to try something different. In This Episode: 0:00 The 46% Stat No One Talks About 0:22 Welcome to Taboo to Truth 0:40 Reframing the Real Question: What Are You Watching? 1:58 What "Ethical Porn" Actually Means 3:14 Inside Free Porn: Pornhub, Consent & the Male Gaze 4:40 How Porn Quietly Distorts Midlife Relationships 5:56 Why Midlife Bodies Can't Compete With the Fantasy 6:41 What Changes When the Content Changes 8:02 Ethical Platforms to Know (Make Love Not Porn, Erika Lust & More) 9:19 How to Evaluate Any Platform + Final Takeaway To watch the video version of this episode, head over to YouTube! About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com LINKS, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS, COURSES & FREEBIES 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

In part two of my conversation with Stacey Roberts, PT, RN, MSN, we go even deeper into the world of shockwave therapy for pelvic pain and sexual health. Stacey and I talk about whether shockwave can help with genitourinary syndrome of menopause, how it compares to the MonaLisa Touch, and why some patients need ongoing treatments while others don't. We get into the most controversial pelvic floor topic there is — Kegels — and why prescribing more of them can actually make things worse for people who are too tight, not too weak. Stacey shares real patient stories, including a vaginismus case tied to a traumatic IUD removal, and we spend real time on the mind-body connection: how breathing, the nervous system, and central sensitization shape chronic pain, and how I worked through my own identity as someone "in pain" after years of back issues. We close with where to find Stacey's podcast, book, and how to track down a qualified softwave provider near you. In This Episode: 00:00 Welcome Back + Part One Recap 00:35 Podcast Intro: Meet Your Host Karen Bigman 01:05 Shockwave for Genitourinary Syndrome of Menopause 02:45 Shockwave vs. the MonaLisa Touch: What's the Difference 04:45 Do You Need Repeat Treatments? It Depends on the Trigger 07:30 ED, Lifestyle Factors & Dr. Irwin Goldstein 08:45 Let's Talk About Kegels (Why They're Not Always the Answer) 11:30 Upregulation, Incontinence & the M-Cella Controversy 13:00 Where We Hold Tension: Shoulders, Pelvis & Protective Bracing 14:15 Trauma Doesn't Always Mean What You Think: The Vaginismus Case 15:45 The Mind-Body Connection: Breathing, the Nervous System & Central Sensitization 18:15 Karen's Own Chronic Pain Story: Identity, Fear & Recovery 19:45 Pain Doesn't Have to Be a Life Sentence: Final Advice 20:45 Finding the Right Surgeon (and Provider) 21:15 Where to Find Stacey: Podcast, Book & Softwave Providers Want a deeper look? Watch the full episode on YouTube for a more visual experience of today’s discussion. This episode is best enjoyed on video—don’t miss out! 👉 Understand Menopause and save your sex life with the Man's Menopause Handbook: https://www.taboototruth.com/enroll/menmeetmenopause About The Guest: Since 1990, Stacey Roberts has specialized in outpatient orthopedics, sports medicine, acute and chronic pain related to joints and muscles, pelvic health, and sexual health. Now, as a master’s trained registered nurse, she combines her successful physical therapy skills, master’s of nursing education with a holistic approach and expanded her practice at New You Health and Wellness with services dedicated to helping people feel better and be active longer. Connect with Stacey Roberts: Website: https://newyouhealthandwellness.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/newyouhealthandwellness About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com LINKS, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS, COURSES & FREEBIES 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

Testing before getting physical is non-negotiable for me — ProDx Health makes it easy. First PASS-certified at-home STI kit, herpes testing included. 15% off: http://prodxhealth.com/discount/taboo In this episode of Taboo To Truth, I tackle the question I hear from men over 50 more than any other: what do women actually want? Instead of another list of app hacks and texting rules, I go underneath the practical questions to the emotional ones that actually determine whether you build a real relationship or just rack up more first dates. I break down why men are re-entering dating with an outdated playbook, what women over 50 consistently tell me they're looking for, and I give eight concrete tips — from healing before you date to knowing the difference between chemistry and compatibility. I close with the reframe that matters most: dating after 50 isn't about finding the right person, it's about becoming the kind of partner who can build the relationship you actually want. In This Episode: 0:00 ProDX Health (STI Testing) 1:45 What Women Over 50 Actually Want 2:19 The Real Questions Men Are Asking 3:15 You're Not Picking Up Where You Left Off 4:02 Why Neither Side Is Being Honest 4:45 What Women Over 50 Really Say They Want 4:58 Tip #1: Heal Before You Date 5:32 Tip #2: Build a Life You Genuinely Enjoy 6:18 Tip #3: Fix Your Finances First 6:52 Tip #4: Get Curious, Ask Better Questions 7:27 Tip #5: Be Authentic From Day One 8:13 Tip #6: Put Real Effort Into Your Profile 8:44 Tip #7: Stop Looking for "The One" 9:12 Tip #8: Chemistry vs. Compatibility 9:46 The Real Question You Should Be Asking 10:30 Final Thoughts & Share This Episode Want a deeper look? Watch the full episode on YouTube for a more visual experience of today’s discussion. This episode is best enjoyed on video—don’t miss out! About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com LINKS, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS, COURSES & FREEBIES 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

In this episode of Taboo To Truth, I sit down with Stacey Roberts, PT, RN, MSN — a physical therapist and holistic nurse with over 30 years of experience in pelvic health, and one of the country's leading experts in shockwave therapy for pelvic pain and sexual dysfunction. Stacey breaks down why up to 30% of women may experience vulvodynia (and why that number is likely underreported), how chronic low back pain can actually be rooted in a tight, "upregulated" pelvic floor, and why men are even less likely than women to get evaluated for pelvic floor issues. We dig into the emotional and physical toll of being told "it's all in your head," the fascia's role in referred pain, and how shockwave — a completely external, non-invasive technology originally developed to break up kidney stones — is now accelerating healing for incontinence, painful intercourse, erectile dysfunction, and vaginismus. Stacey also shares an eyebrow-raising pilot finding on shockwave and testosterone. This is part one of a two-part conversation — part two is coming soon. In this episode: 00:00 Shockwave Therapy?! 00:45 Welcome to Taboo to Truth 01:15 Meet Stacey Roberts: 30+ Years in Pelvic & Sexual Health 01:45 How Common Is Pelvic Pain & Sexual Dysfunction, Really? 03:00 Low Back Pain: Foam Roller Fix or Something Deeper? 06:00 Men vs. Women: Why Pelvic Pain Shows Up Differently 09:00 Surgery, "It's All in Your Head," and the Repressed Emotion Connection 12:30 Pelvic Floor & Sexual Dysfunction: Shoutout to Dr. Lance Frank 14:15 The Pudendal Nerve: How Internal Treatment Improves External Sensation 16:30 Non-Surgical Treatment Options: Pelvic Floor Therapy, Fascia & Botox 19:00 From Kidney Stones to Muscles: The History of Shockwave Therapy 20:30 What Shockwave Actually Feels Like (and the Vaginismus Case Study) 22:15 Shockwave, Testosterone & Treating Testicular Health 23:45 Wrap-Up: Part Two Is Coming — Subscribe & Follow Want a deeper look? Watch the full episode on YouTube for a more visual experience of today’s discussion. This episode is best enjoyed on video—don’t miss out! 👉 Understand Menopause and save your sex life with the Man's Menopause Handbook: https://www.taboototruth.com/enroll/menmeetmenopause About The Guest: Since 1990, Stacey Roberts has specialized in outpatient orthopedics, sports medicine, acute and chronic pain related to joints and muscles, pelvic health, and sexual health. Now, as a master’s trained registered nurse, she combines her successful physical therapy skills, master’s of nursing education with a holistic approach and expanded her practice at New You Health and Wellness with services dedicated to helping people feel better and be active longer. Connect with Stacey Roberts: Website: https://newyouhealthandwellness.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/newyouhealthandwellness About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com LINKS, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS, COURSES & FREEBIES 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

👉 Understand Menopause and save your sex life with the Man's Menopause Handbook: https://www.taboototruth.com/enroll/menmeetmenopause 🔥 Spice things up and get creative with arya.fyi Intimacy Concierge (code TRUTH15 for 15% off) One in three midlife couples is living in a sexless marriage — and almost nobody is talking about it. In this episode of Taboo To Truth, I break down why so many women lose interest in sex during perimenopause and menopause, covering the real physiological, emotional, and relational causes: hormonal chaos, genitourinary symptoms, the shift from spontaneous to responsive desire, painful sex, stress, and unresolved relationship friction. I reframe the silence not as a sign the relationship is over, but as the absence of a roadmap — and lay out concrete paths forward, from HRT and testosterone therapy to lube, communication, and trying something new together. I close with a challenge: name the one conversation you've been avoiding, and take the first step. In This Episode: 00:00 — Aria.fyi (Code TRUTH15) 00:41 — Welcome to Taboo to Truth 00:56 — The Most Common Complaint I Hear 01:37 — You're Not Alone (And It's Biopsychosocial) 02:09 — Why Couples Never Talk About Sex 03:02 — The Real Reasons She's Lost Interest 04:18 — The Hope: HRT, Testosterone & Hormone Truths 04:53 — Fixing Desire, Arousal & Painful Sex 05:25 — Stress, Creativity & the Relationship Check 06:09 — The Silence That Breaks Connection — And Your Next Move Want a deeper look? Watch the full episode on YouTube for a more visual experience of today’s discussion. This episode is best enjoyed on video—don’t miss out! If this episode gave you something to think about, share it with someone who needs it — and leave a review if you're listening on Apple or Spotify Podcasts. About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com LINKS, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS, COURSES & FREEBIES 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

The antidote to a boring sex life isn't trying harder, it's trying something new together — Take the quiz at arya.fyi and use code: TRUTH15 for 15% off their guided intimacy subscription at https://arya.fyi/start?rfsn=8333683.c9f861 In Part 2 of my conversation with Sabrina Johnson, founder, president, and CEO of Daré Bioscience (NASDAQ: DARE), we get into everything we didn't have time for in Part 1 — starting with the practical questions every woman actually wants answered about Dare to Play. We talk about how to use the sildenafil cream (where to apply it, what it feels like, and yes — what it tastes like if oral sex is on the table). Then we go wide. Sabrina walks me through the full Daré pipeline: Dare to Reclaim, a once-a-month vaginal ring delivering both progesterone and estradiol together (coming next year as a compounded prescription); a non-hormonal tamoxifen vaginal insert in development for breast cancer survivors who can't take estrogen; and Dare to Restore FloraSync LF5, a clinically studied vaginal probiotic launching this quarter. We also get into one of the most important consumer conversations I've had on this show: the truth about compounding. Compounded doesn't mean better — and Sabrina breaks down exactly what to ask when your doctor prescribes something, including whether the actual formula (not just the ingredient) has been clinically studied and published. And she closes with something I wasn't expecting — an invitation for anyone to invest in Daré Bioscience for as little as $250. Because if only 1% of healthcare dollars go to women's health, maybe it's time women funded it themselves. In This Episode: 0:00 – Welcome Back & Part 1 Recap 1:00 – How to Use Dare to Play: Where, How & What It Tastes Like 4:00 – How Long Do the Effects Last? 6:00 – Why Sabrina Founded Daré Bioscience 9:30 – Dare to Reclaim: Once-a-Month Vaginal Ring for Menopause 13:30 – A Non-Hormonal Solution for Breast Cancer Survivors 16:00 – The Truth About Compounded Medications 20:30 – How to Spot Junk Science & Ask Better Questions 22:30 – Dare to Restore: Clinically Studied Vaginal Probiotic 25:00 – Invest in Women's Health: Daré's Public Offering 26:40 – Wrap Up About The Guest: Sabrina Martucci Johnson is a seasoned life sciences executive and passionate advocate for women’s health innovation. As Founder, President,and Chief Executive Officer of Daré Bioscience, Inc. (NASDAQ: DARE), she leads a purpose-driven biopharmaceutical company dedicated to developing and commercializing novel, differentiated products for women. Under her leadership, Daré advances a diverse pipeline spanning contraception, fertility,menopause, sexual health, and vaginal health, with the goal of accelerating access to important therapies. Her leadership has been honored by Ernst &Young Entrepreneur of the Year (Pacific Southwest Region), Fierce Pharma’sMost Influential People in Biopharma, and inclusion on the Medicine MakerPower List and Endpoints Women in Biopharma. Driven by the belief that women deserve better options, Ms. Johnson champions innovation to transform how women worldwide experience their health and well-being. Connect with Sabrina Johnson: Website: https://darebioscience.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/darebioscience DARE to PLAY™ Sildenafil Cream: https://daretoplaybio.com Invest: https://darebioscience.com/funding About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com LINKS, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS, COURSES & FREEBIES 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

Guys, check out b-Vibe's 360 Plug — the male equivalent of the rabbit. It's a remote-controlled vibrator with 360° rotation, a smooth silicone body, and simultaneous prostate and perianal pleasure. Grab yours at bvibe.com and use code TABOO25 for 25% off! Erectile dysfunction affects tens of millions of men in the U.S., yet stays wrapped in silence and shame. In this episode, I bust the biggest ED myth — that it's a permanent, unfixable part of aging — and walk through the full range of treatment options available today. I cover penile implants, vacuum erection devices, testosterone replacement therapy, and FDA-approved medications like Viagra and Cialis, then move into natural approaches: therapy, lifestyle changes, key nutrients, and sex toys that keep intimacy alive during treatment. I close with a look at emerging treatments on the horizon — shockwave therapy, stem cells, PRP, and gene therapy — and a clear call to action: talk to your doctor, because ED is treatable and no one has to navigate it alone. In This Episode: 00:00 — bvibe 360 Plug (code TABOO25) 00:50 — Podcast Intro / Welcome to Taboo to Truth 01:10 — Welcome Back + ED Stats 01:55 — What This Episode Will Cover 02:15 — Myth-Busting: ED Is NOT a Permanent Part of Aging 03:00 — Treatment #1: Penile Implants 04:05 — Treatment #2: Vacuum Erection Devices (Pumps) 05:00 — Treatment #3: Testosterone Replacement Therapy (TRT) 05:50 — Treatment #4: FDA-Approved Medications (Viagra, Cialis, Levitra, Stendra) 06:35 — Natural Approaches: Counseling & Sex Therapy 07:35 — Lifestyle Changes & Key Nutrients (Citrulline, Vitamin D/E, Zinc) 08:20 — Sex Toys: Staying Intimate During Treatment 09:10 — The Future of ED Treatment (Shockwave, Stem Cells, PRP, Gene Therapy) 10:05 — Fastest Way to Fix ED + Key Takeaway 11:00 — Outro: Subscribe + Hotter, Wiser, Wilder Course Want a deeper look? Watch the full episode on YouTube for a more visual experience of today’s discussion. This episode is best enjoyed on video—don’t miss out! 👀 Erectile Dysfunction and Heart Health: What Your Body Is Telling You: https://www.taboototruth.com/post/erectile-dysfunction-and-heart-health-what-your-body-is-telling-you About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com If you want to understand the midlife shift, stop navigating it alone, and show up with more confidence in your relationships — I'm building something just for you. Sign up and be the first to know! Sign up and be the first to know! 🛍️ Want to enhance intimacy and confidence? Check out my product review page: https://www.taboototruth.com/blog/categories/product-reviews LINKS, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS, COURSES & FREEBIES 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

The antidote to a boring sex life isn't trying harder, it's trying something new together — Take the quiz at arya.fyi and use code: TRUTH15 for 15% off their guided intimacy subscription at https://arya.fyi/start?rfsn=8333683.c9f861 In this episode of Taboo To Truth, I sit down with Sabrina Johnson — founder, president, and CEO of Daré Bioscience — to tackle a question that's been 27 years overdue: where is the female equivalent of Viagra? Sabrina breaks down the critical distinction between libido (desire, the mental appetite for sex) and physical arousal (the body's blood flow response), explaining why the two require completely different solutions — and why the pharmaceutical industry has largely ignored the latter in women. She shares the science and story behind Dare to Play, a topical sildenafil cream engineered with proprietary Dermaflex technology to deliver the active ingredient directly to genital tissue, enhancing physical arousal sensations within 10–15 minutes. We cover how Dare to Play compares to existing options like Addyi, Vyleesi, and testosterone — and why none of those address physical arousal the way this does. We also clear up a common misconception: this is not a lubricant. It works from the inside out, enhancing the body's natural lubrication response through increased blood flow. Sabrina walks us through exactly how to get a prescription today — via your own provider or a free telehealth consult— and explains the pricing: $99/tube, 10 doses, roughly $10 per use. Currently out of pocket (no insurance), but intentionally priced for access. This is Part 1 of a two-part conversation you won't want to miss. In This Episode: 0:00 – Ad: Aria.FYI 0:55 – Welcome to Taboo to Truth 1:30 – Meet Sabrina Johnson, CEO of Daré Bioscience 2:15 – Libido vs. Physical Arousal: What's Actually the Difference? 5:15 – The Real Reason There's No Female Viagra (Until Now) 8:15 – Introducing Dare to Play: Sildenafil Cream Engineered for Women 10:15 – How to Get a Prescription Today (Free Telehealth Consult) 13:15 – What Does It Cost? The $99 Tube, $10 Per Use Breakdown 15:15 – Dare to Play vs. Addyi, Vyleesi & Testosterone 17:15 – Is This a Lubricant? No — Here's the Key Difference 18:50 – Part 2 Is Coming — Subscribe Now Want a deeper look? Watch the full episode on YouTube for a more visual experience of today’s discussion. This episode is best enjoyed on video—don’t miss out! About The Guest: Sabrina Martucci Johnson is a seasoned life sciences executive and passionate advocate for women’s health innovation. As Founder, President,and Chief Executive Officer of Daré Bioscience, Inc. (NASDAQ: DARE), she leads a purpose-driven biopharmaceutical company dedicated to developing and commercializing novel, differentiated products for women. Under her leadership, Daré advances a diverse pipeline spanning contraception, fertility,menopause, sexual health, and vaginal health, with the goal of accelerating access to important therapies. Her leadership has been honored by Ernst &Young Entrepreneur of the Year (Pacific Southwest Region), Fierce Pharma’sMost Influential People in Biopharma, and inclusion on the Medicine MakerPower List and Endpoints Women in Biopharma. Driven by the belief that women deserve better options, Ms. Johnson champions innovation to transform how women worldwide experience their health and well-being. Connect with Sabrina Johnson: Website: https://darebioscience.com DARE to PLAY™ Sildenafil Cream: https://daretoplaybio.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/darebioscience About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com LINKS, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS, COURSES & FREEBIES 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

The antidote to a boring sex life isn't trying harder, it's trying something new together — Take the quiz at arya.fyi and use code: TRUTH15 for 15% off their guided intimacy subscription at https://arya.fyi/start?rfsn=8333683.c9f861 Everyone talks about narcissists, but do you actually know what to look for? I'm breaking down six concrete behavioral signs of a true narcissist — and more importantly, why we keep missing them. I walk through what separates a genuine narcissist from someone who's just self-centered, explain the psychological traps — love bombing, trauma bonding, gaslighting — that keep us stuck, and give you a real checklist to spot what you've been talking yourself out of seeing. From frustration intolerance and subtle put-downs to aggressive driving and the apology cycle that never ends, these signs show up in the first year. The question is whether you're willing to see them. In This Episode: 0:00 - Sponsor: Aria.FYI 0:35 - Welcome to Taboo to Truth 0:50 - What Makes Someone a True Narcissist 1:55 - Love Bombing & Why the Signs Are Easy to Miss 2:40 - Sign #1: Frustration Tolerance (Tantrums & Grudges) 3:20 - Sign #2: Talking Over You & Subtle Put-Downs 3:55 - Sign #3: Isolation & Loyalty Tests 4:30 - Sign #4: Aggressive Driving (Backed by 30+ Studies) 5:05 - Sign #5: The Apology Fandango 5:40 - Sign #6: The Explosion & Acting Like Nothing Happened 6:25 - Why We Miss the Red Flags: The Trauma Bond 7:05 - How to Actually Protect Yourself 7:35 - Final Thoughts Want a deeper look? Watch the full episode on YouTube for a more visual experience of today’s discussion. This episode is best enjoyed on video—don’t miss out! About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com LINKS, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS, COURSES & FREEBIES 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

The antidote to a boring sex life isn't trying harder, it's trying something new together — that's what ARYA delivers, a monthly intimacy membership curated by AASECT certified sexologists and shipped right to your door. Take the quiz at arya.fyi and use code: TRUTH15 for 15% off at https://arya.fyi/start?rfsn=8333683.c9f861 In this episode, I sit down with Adreena Winters — writer, educator, and one of the most recognized voices in the world of cuckolding — to finally clear up what this dynamic actually is, and what it isn't. Adreena is the author of So You Want to Be a Cuckold and the creator of Cuckold Confessions, and she brings both lived experience and years of coaching couples through this exact terrain. We get into why most people's first reaction to the word "cuckolding" is shame or confusion, and why that reaction is almost always wrong. Adreena breaks down the real difference between a hot wife dynamic and a cuckoldress dynamic, why humiliation is usually a small piece of the puzzle rather than the main event, and why compersion — genuinely enjoying your partner's pleasure — is so often the real engine driving this for men. We talk about how couples actually start exploring this safely: communication first, boundaries second, and why over-controlling the experience can backfire. Adreena walks through the biggest mistakes couples make (hint: it usually starts with who you let into the dynamic), the red flags that signal someone isn't a good third-party candidate, and the warning signs that a couple isn't actually ready for this yet. We also get into the Red Pill and Manosphere comparison — because consent is the dividing line, and it changes everything. If you've ever been curious, confused, or quietly judging something you don't fully understand, this conversation will give you the real picture instead of the porn version. In This Episode: 00:00 Intro & Aria.FYI 01:15 Welcome to Taboo to Truth 01:45 Meet Adreena Winters 02:30 Why Cuckolding Is So Misunderstood 04:00 Cuckoldress vs. Hot Wife: What's the Real Difference 06:30 Is the Bull Part of the Couple's Dynamic? 08:15 Who Usually Initiates: Men or Women? 10:00 Cutting Queens & Reversed Dynamics 12:00 Where to Start: Communication and Boundaries 14:30 No, It's Not Always a Threesome 16:00 Biggest Mistakes Couples Make 18:30 Red Flags When Vetting a Bull 20:30 Signs a Couple Isn't Ready Yet 23:00 The Porn Fantasy vs. The Reality 26:00 Adreena's Own Relationship & Retiring From Porn 28:30 Cuckold Confessions: Filming Real Couples 30:00 Finding a Bull: Apps, Sites & Communities 31:30 Cuckolding vs. The Manosphere & Red Pill 32:30 Is Cuckolding Cheating? 33:00 Where to Find Adrena & Closing Thoughts About The Guest: Adreena Winters is a content creator, writer, and educator known for her work exploring cuckolding. With over a decade of experience both personally and professionally in the adult industry, she has become one of the most recognisable voices discussing cuckolding openly and without shame. Adreena is the author of So, You Want to Be a Cuckold?, and the creator of Cuckold Confessions, a series exploring the motivations and desires of men who embrace the cuckold identity. Through her writing, videos, and podcast appearances, she aims to demystify taboo fantasies and encourage more honest conversations about sexuality, desire, and power within relationships. Connect with Adreena Winters: Website: https://thecuckacademy.com/ Links: https://links.adrena-winters.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/coachadreena About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com LINKS, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS, COURSES & FREEBIES 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

The antidote to a boring sex life isn't trying harder, it's trying something new together — that's what ARYA delivers, a monthly intimacy membership curated by AASECT certified sexologists and shipped right to your door. Take the quiz at arya.fyi and use code: TRUTH15 for 15% off at https://arya.fyi/start?rfsn=8333683.c9f861 In this episode, I'm tackling the topic nobody wants to bring up at dinner: cheating. Whether you've been cheated on, you've done the cheating, or you've just thought about it (and most of us have), this conversation is for you. I'm breaking down what infidelity actually is, why it shows up so often in midlife, and whether it's ever justified. I get into the messy truth that affairs are rarely about sex — they're about disconnection, unmet needs, and the stories we tell ourselves instead of having hard conversations. I'm not excusing cheating. I am asking you to understand it, because understanding is the first step toward preventing it, surviving it, or having the honest conversation you've been avoiding. In This Episode: 00:00 - Sponsor: Aria Intimacy Membership 00:48 - Welcome to Taboo to Truth 01:10 - Introduction: Talking About Cheating Like Adults 01:30 - What Actually Counts as Cheating? 02:15 - Why Cheating Happens More in Midlife 02:50 - Is Cheating Ever Justified? 03:55 - Are We Even Wired for Monogamy? 04:40 - Open Relationships vs. Cheating: Where's the Line? 05:10 - What to Do If You've Been Cheated On 06:05 - How to Prevent Infidelity Before It Happens 06:45 - Final Thoughts: Choosing Honesty Want a deeper look? Watch the full episode on YouTube for a more visual experience of today's discussion. This episode is best enjoyed on video—don't miss out! About The Host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com DISCLAIMER: This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. This content is created for educational and informational purposes only. It is designed to provide viewers with knowledge and insights about intimacy, relationships, communication, and sexual wellness. This video does not depict or promote sexual acts for the purpose of sexual gratification. All discussions are conducted in a respectful, professional, and sex-positive context to encourage healthy, safe, and informed conversations. I have hand-selected some great products to help support your s//xual wellness. Purchasing products from me and/or my affiliates helps support the work that I do and ensures I can continue to help as many people and couples as possible! LINKS, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS, COURSES & FREEBIES 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser In this episode, I'm back with Shana James for Part 2 of our conversation — and this time we're getting into the real, messy, funny, and deeply human side of dating in midlife. Shana breaks down the most common mistakes people make when they're back out there after divorce or a long relationship, starting with the one thing most people skip entirely: knowing what they actually want. We talk about love, lust, and partnership as three completely separate dimensions — and why collapsing them into one is where so many relationships go wrong. Shana shares her own stories of fumbling through dating after divorce, why she won't date someone who's fresh out of a relationship, and what happened when she gave her current partner a chance even when the initial chemistry wasn't there. We also get into why instant chemistry can actually be a red flag rooted in attachment wounds, how to spark connection instead of just waiting for it, and what to do if you're in a relationship that feels stuck. Shana closes with her best advice for anyone who's dating or partnered and feeling lost — and it's simpler and more powerful than you'd expect. In this episode: 00:00 Welcome Back — Going Even Deeper in Part 2 01:20 The Most Common Midlife Dating Mistakes 03:45 Know Yourself Before You Date — Why It Matters 06:00 Love, Lust, and Partnership Are Not the Same Thing 08:15 Fumbling Through Dating After Divorce — And That's Okay 10:30 Karen's Recent First Date Story (And What Honesty Made Possible) 12:50 Is the Best Love and Sex of Your Life Still Ahead of You? 15:15 The Myth of Happy Sex — Shana's Most Vulnerable Story 17:40 Why Instant Chemistry Might Be a Red Flag 19:55 How to Spark Chemistry Instead of Waiting for It 21:40 Advice for Anyone Stuck in Love or Dating Right Now 23:00 Where to Find Shana James Want a deeper look? Watch the full episode on YouTube for a more visual experience of today’s discussion. This episode is best enjoyed on video—don’t miss out! About the guest: As a relationship and dating coach for 20+ years, Shana James humbly discovered the causes of disconnection and distrust in relationships, as well as how to build trust and keep passion alive. Shana has facilitated decades ofAuthentic Relating workshops based on her training in communication, mindfulness, psychology and sensuality, and specializes in helping clients date and create healthy relationships after divorce. Shana brings her Master’s in psychology, DISC and Positive Intelligence certifications to her book:Honest Sex: A Passionate Path to Deepen Connection and Keep RelationshipsAlive. She also hosts two podcasts: Man Alive and Practicing Love, and has aTEDx Talk, 'What 1000 Men's Tears Reveal About the Crisis Between Men andWomen.' Connect with Shana James: Website: https://shanajamescoaching.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/shanajames/ Resources: https://shanajamescoaching.com/resources-3/ About the host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com LINKS, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS, COURSES & FREEBIES 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

🍋 Use code TABOO25 at hellonancy.com for 25% off Lem, Avo, and Berry. 🔗 https://hellonancy.com/discount/TABOO25 In this episode, I review three clitoral vibrators from Hello Nancy — the LEM, the Berri, and the AVO — through the specific lens of what menopausal and perimenopausal bodies actually need. I explain why estrogen decline changes blood flow, lubrication, tissue sensitivity, and arousal response, and why that makes toy selection matter more in midlife than ever before. I break down each toy's design, stimulation style, and ideal use case, compare suction-based air pulse technology versus direct contact vibration, and give a clear recommendation for which toy fits which body and preference. I also share tips on lubricant use, vaginal estrogen, and how to introduce toys into partnered intimacy — because menopause is not the end of pleasure. It's the beginning of needing better information and better tools. 🚨 If you are a man navigating your partner’s menopause and feel lost, check out my NEW course ‘Men Meet Menopause’! AND to celebrate the launch, I'mm giving you 20% off with code MMPLAUNCH20 https://bit.ly/MeenMeetMenopause In this episode: 00:00 Welcome to Taboo to Truth 00:20 Who I Am and What I'm Reviewing Today 00:48 Why Menopause Changes Everything About Stimulation 01:25 Meet the LEM — Air Pulse Tech for Menopausal Bodies 02:10 Meet the Berry — Focused Intensity for Faster Arousal 02:52 Meet the AVO — Ergonomic Comfort for Partnered Sex 03:28 Suction vs Direct Stimulation — What's the Difference? 04:02 Lubricant, Vaginal Estrogen, and Body-Safe Tips 04:30 Which One Should You Choose? 04:55 Discount Code + Men Meet Menopause Course Want a deeper look? Watch the full episode on YouTube for a more visual experience of today’s discussion. This episode is best enjoyed on video—don’t miss out! Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com LINKS, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS, COURSES & FREEBIES 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F In this episode, I sit down with Shana James — relationship and dating coach with 20 years of experience, TED Talk speaker, and author of Honest Sex — to explore the real reasons men and women keep failing each other in love and intimacy. Shana has coached thousands of men and women, and what she's uncovered is that the patterns keeping us stuck aren't about gender — they're about communication, vulnerability, and a fundamental lost-in-translation moment most couples never address. We get into why men struggle to open up (and what it actually takes for them to feel safe enough to try), why women aren't as naturally vulnerable as we think, and what men told Shana behind closed doors that women never get to hear. We also dive into the desire-rejection spiral — where it starts, who's responsible for breaking it, and how perimenopause adds a whole new layer of complexity to intimacy and dating. Shana also shares her expanded definition of sex from Honest Sex, and why letting go of the baseball analogy might change everything. This is Part 1 of a two-part conversation — and we're just getting started. In This Episode: 00:00 Why Men and Women Keep Failing Each Other 01:18 Meet Shana James — 20 Years Coaching Both Sides 02:15 The #1 Pattern Keeping Couples Stuck: Communication 04:05 How to Get Men to Open Up — What Actually Works 06:40 The Surprise: Women Struggle with Vulnerability Too 08:55 Are Men Really Emotionally Unavailable? The Real Answer 11:10 What 1,000 Men's Tears Reveal About the Crisis Between Men and Women 13:30 The Desire Spiral: Where It Starts and Who Breaks It 15:45 Dating and Intimacy During Perimenopause 18:00 What Is Sex, Really? Shana's Expanded Definition 19:40 Part 2 Is Coming — Subscribe So You Don't Miss It Want a deeper look? Watch the full episode on YouTube for a more visual experience of today’s discussion. This episode is best enjoyed on video—don’t miss out! About the guest: As a relationship and dating coach for 20+ years, Shana James humbly discovered the causes of disconnection and distrust in relationships, as well as how to build trust and keep passion alive. Shana has facilitated decades ofAuthentic Relating workshops based on her training in communication, mindfulness, psychology and sensuality, and specializes in helping clients date and create healthy relationships after divorce. Shana brings her Master’s in psychology, DISC and Positive Intelligence certifications to her book:Honest Sex: A Passionate Path to Deepen Connection and Keep RelationshipsAlive. She also hosts two podcasts: Man Alive and Practicing Love, and has aTEDx Talk, 'What 1000 Men's Tears Reveal About the Crisis Between Men andWomen.' Connect with Shana James: Website: https://shanajamescoaching.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/shanajames/ Resources: https://shanajamescoaching.com/resources-3/ About the host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook. LINKS, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS, COURSES & FREEBIES 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

🛒 Get 15% off the Max PR from Firm Tech with code TABOO15 at myfirmtech.com 🛍️ Want to enhance intimacy and confidence? Check out my curated products page at https://www.taboototruth.com/shop In this episode, I'm tackling one of the most quietly carried anxieties in male sexuality — penis size. Not just the anatomy, but the psychology behind it. I break down the real clinical data on average erect penis size, explain why girth is actually the more relevant factor (and why nobody talks about it), and unpack why the shower vs. grower phenomenon means flaccid comparisons tell you virtually nothing. I walk through what every major enlargement option — injections, surgery, traction extenders, and pumps — actually delivers, what the risks are, and why none of them address the real issue. I share what women consistently say matters most in a sexual partner (hint: it has nothing to do with inches), and why confidence, presence, communication, and genuine curiosity about your partner's body are the real drivers of great sex. If size anxiety has ever taken up space in your head, this episode is an honest, data-backed answer. Timestamps: 00:00 - Introduction & What This Episode Is Really About 01:15 - Small Penis Anxiety: The Clinical Term and What It Means 02:00 - The Real Data: Average Erect Penis Size 02:45 - Girth vs. Length — Why Girth Matters More 03:15 - The Shower vs. Grower Phenomenon 03:45 - What Women Actually Say They Want in Bed 05:00 - Why the Obsession Persists: Porn, Culture & Performance Pressure 06:30 - Enlargement Options: Injections, Surgery, Extenders & Pumps 08:30 - What Actually Matters More Than Size 09:45 - A Personal Anecdote: Size Is Not the Whole Story 10:30 - Realistic Expectations & Final Takeaways 11:10 - Outro & How to Support the Show Want a deeper look? Watch the full episode on YouTube for a more visual experience of today’s discussion. This episode is best enjoyed on video—don’t miss out! Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com 🚨 If you are a man navigating your partner’s menopause and feel lost, check out my NEW course ‘Men Meet Menopause’! AND to celebrate the launch, iI am giving you 20% off with code MMPLAUNCH20 https://bit.ly/MeenMeetMenopause

💋 Sex Ed For Adults | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/courses When your partner won't engage — won't go to therapy, won't talk, won't try — what are your actual options? In Part 2 of this two-part conversation, I sit down again with sex therapist Dr. Jenni Skyler and her husband and fellow therapist Daniel Lebowitz to get into the harder, messier truths about long-term desire. We tackle what happens when one partner is simply done trying, why sexual stagnation is the real relationship killer, how to tell your partner you're bored without blowing everything up, and the psychological concept most people have never heard of — the Madonna-whore complex (also called the love-lust split) — and why it's quietly killing men's desire for their own partners. Plus, I ask the question everyone's thinking: do two therapists actually have a perfect marriage? In this episode: 00:00 — Introduction & recap of Part 1 01:10 — When your partner refuses therapy, refuses sex, refuses everything 04:20 — What to do when divorce isn't an option 06:45 — The Ashley Madison story: meeting your own needs 09:00 — How to declare your needs without issuing an ultimatum 11:30 — Is it realistic to be with one person sexually for 50+ years? 14:00 — Stagnation is what kills desire — not incompatibility 16:20 — How to tell your partner you're bored (without saying "you're boring") 18:45 — Menopause, postpartum, and sexual stagnation windows 21:00 — Grieving the previous chapter of your relationship 22:15 — Men Meet Menopause: Karen's course plug 23:00 — Do two sex therapists have a perfect marriage? 25:10 — The Madonna-whore complex and the love-lust split explained 27:30 — Why men need to become experts in their own relationships 28:40 — Where to find Dr. Jenni Skyler & Daniel Lebowitz Want a deeper look? Watch the full episode on YouTube for a more visual experience of today’s discussion. This episode is best enjoyed on video—don’t miss out! Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com LINKS, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS, COURSES & FREEBIES 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

In this episode, I'm diving into something most men have never been taught but desperately need to hear — how your nervous system is directly controlling your desire, your erections, and your ability to connect intimately. If you're in midlife and noticing that your body isn't cooperating the way it used to, this is the episode that explains why — and what to actually do about it. I walk through the two modes of the nervous system, survival and safety, and why sex can only happen in one of them. I break down how decades of performance-based sexual conditioning quietly puts men into survival mode — and how shame keeps them there. Then I get practical, sharing the tools I give men every day to regulate their nervous system, rebuild a sense of safety, and reconnect with their bodies and their partners. Timestamps: 00:00 - What's really behind unpredictable erections in midlife 00:48 - Welcome & what we're covering today 01:35 - The sexual performance model most men were raised with 02:22 - Survival mode vs. safety mode — and why sex requires safety 03:08 - What survival mode actually looks like during sex 03:50 - Why shame shuts down intimacy faster than low testosterone 04:55 - Safety vs. confidence — and which one you actually need 05:42 - Substack community callout 06:10 - Practical tools: regulate before you initiate 06:58 - Naming it, shifting the goal, and building safety outside the bedroom 07:45 - You're not broken — you're waking up 08:10 - Resources, Men Meet Menopause course & closing Want a deeper look? Watch the full episode on YouTube for a more visual experience of today’s discussion. This episode is best enjoyed on video—don’t miss out! 📌 Resources mentioned: Men Meet Menopause Course: https://www.taboototruth.com Want to enhance intimacy and confidence? Check out my curated products page at https://www.taboototruth.com/shop Get 15% off the Max PR from Firm Tech with code TABOO15 at myfirmtech.com Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook. 📩 Join me on Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com 📖 Download the Pleasure Playbook: https://www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook

In this episode, I sit down with two powerhouse sex therapists — Dr. Jenni Skyler and Daniel Lebowitz — to dig into one of the most common and least talked-about issues in long-term relationships: mismatched libidos. We're breaking down what desire discrepancy really means, why it doesn't have to spell the end of your sex life, and why the person wanting less sex is never simply "the problem." We get honest about the shame spiral that shuts men down sexually, the hidden reasons behind low male desire (from testosterone to performance anxiety to cultural conditioning), and the exact language that can open a conversation your partner has been too scared to start. This is Part 1 of 2 — and it's essential listening for anyone who has ever felt rejected in the bedroom or guilty for saying no. In this episode: 00:00 - Welcome & Guest Introductions 01:50 - What Is Desire Discrepancy — And Who Has It? 04:25 - Why Nobody's the Problem (But It Feels That Way) 06:40 - When She Wants It More Than He Does 09:20 - The Hidden Reasons Behind Low Male Desire 12:55 - How to Start the Conversation With a Shut-Down Partner 16:10 - The Two Words That Change Everything: You Matter 19:05 - Getting Into Therapy: Where Do You Even Start? 21:30 - The Bilingual Couple: Unlocking Desire Through Language 24:20 - Men's Shame, Sensuality & the Missing Safe Spaces 26:40 - Sexual Rejection and the Fear of Not Belonging 27:50 - Part 2 Teaser & Where to Find the Guests Want a deeper look? Watch the full episode on YouTube for a more visual experience of today’s discussion. This episode is best enjoyed on video—don’t miss out! 🚨 If you are a man navigating your partner’s menopause and feel lost, check out my NEW course ‘Men Meet Menopause’! AND to celebrate the launch, iI am giving you 20% off with code MMPLAUNCH20 https://bit.ly/MeenMeetMenopause Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast About the Guests: Dr. Jenni Skyler and Daniel Lebowitz are the directors of The Intimacy Institute. They have been in practice for over 16 years, offering the best in relationship and clinical sex therapy. Their practice offers both telehealth services and three-day couples retreats from their office in Colorado. As licensed and certified therapists with professional, personal, and parenting experience, they help elevate relationships to the next level. Connect with Jenni & Daniel: Website: https://www.intimacyinstitute.org/ Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/drjenniskyler https://www.instagram.com/sexandthepsychepod/ Podcast: https://www.intimacyinstitute.org/sex-and-the-psyche About the host: Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook. Want a deeper look? Watch the full episode on YouTube for a more visual experience of today’s discussion. This episode is best enjoyed on video—don’t miss out! LINKS, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS, COURSES & FREEBIES 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

In this episode, I'm talking about one of the most common and least discussed experiences in midlife: painful sex. Whether it's dryness, tightness, uncomfortable positioning, or intimacy that has quietly faded, I want you to know this is not normal aging and it is not something you have to accept. Bodies change as we get older — hormones shift, tissue thins, muscles tighten, and positions that once worked no longer do — but that doesn't mean pleasure is off the table. I walk through what's actually happening physiologically, why pain during sex is never something to push through, and the practical tools that can help: quality lubricants, pelvic floor physical therapy, honest communication with partners, and strategic positioning support. I also introduce the Prim Pillow by Taboo, a wedge-shaped cushion I personally use and love, and share exactly how I use it to reduce strain, change angles, and make intimacy feel comfortable and connected again. Great sex in midlife is possible — it just looks different than it did at 30, and that's not a problem. It's an opportunity. This is a highly visual episode and is best watched on video: https://youtu.be/_oXa6NOR_FQ In this episode: 00:00 - Welcome & What This Episode Is About 00:47 - Introduction: Pain With Sex Is Not Normal 01:30 - Sex After 50 — A Different but Better Conversation 02:00 - What Actually Changes in Your Body as You Age 02:51 - Why Pain During Sex Is Never Something to Tolerate 03:02 - Tools That Help: Lube, Pelvic Floor PT & Communication 03:28 - Introducing the Prim Pillow by Taboo 04:42 - How to Use the Prim Pillow: Hip Elevation & Positioning 05:54 - Why Lube Matters & the PJUR Med Sensitive Recommendation 06:45 - Positioning Tips: Angles, Comfort & Communication 07:14 - Sex Doesn't Expire — It Evolves 07:55 - You Deserve Intimacy That Feels Good at Every Age 08:13 - Resources & Where to Find Karen 08:32 - Outro: Subscribe, Share & Make the World More Sex-Positive Want a deeper look? Watch the full episode on YouTube for a more visual experience of today’s discussion. This episode is best enjoyed on video—don’t miss out! 🔗 Resources mentioned: Pain-Free Sex resources: https://www.taboototruth.com/post/aging-and-sex-after-50-how-to-reduce-pain-increase-pleasure Prim Pillow by Tabu: https://www.heytabu.com Pjure Lube (PJUR Med Sensitive Water-Based): https://www.pntrac.com/t/8-10991-371921-141081?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.babeland.com%2Fsearch%3Fst%3Dproduct%26q%3Dpjur Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook. LINKS, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS, COURSES & FREEBIES 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🚨 If you are a man navigating your partner’s menopause and feel lost, check out my NEW course ‘Men Meet Menopause’! AND to celebrate the launch, iI am giving you 20% off with code MMPLAUNCH20 https://bit.ly/MeenMeetMenopause 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

In this episode, I'm back with Dr. Sameena Rahman for Part 2 — and we go places most medical appointments never do. We open with PCOS, GLP-1s, peptides, and ketamine, then shift into what may be the most important hormone conversation I've had on this show: is hormone therapy actually safe for women over 60? Dr. Rahman breaks down why the original Women's Health Initiative study was mismarketed, not flawed — and how that bad marketing set back women's health by two decades. She explains how to think about the risk-benefit calculation for starting hormones later in life, and what screenings actually matter before making that call. We then get into the reality of concierge medicine — why so many doctors are leaving insurance-based practices, and what women who can't afford private care can actually do. And we close on a myth that genuinely alarmed me: the idea that women over 65 no longer need pelvic exams. Dr. Rahman sets the record straight — and explains why genitourinary syndrome menopau In This Episode: 00:00 - Welcome Back & Recap of Part 1 01:20 - PCOS Explained: What It Is and Who It Affects 02:50 - GLP-1s, Peptides & Ketamine: What the Evidence Actually Says 05:10 - Hormone Therapy After 60: Is It Safe? 07:30 - The WHI Study: Bad Marketing, Not Bad Science 09:20 - Heart Health, Bone Health & Who Should Consider Starting Late 11:45 - Why Doctors Are Moving to Concierge Medicine 14:00 - The Insurance System Is Rigged Against Women 16:05 - What to Do If You Can't Afford a Specialist 17:45 - The Pelvic Exam Myth Putting Women at Risk 19:15 - Genitourinary Syndrome, Vaginal Estrogen & UTI Prevention 20:50 - Final Thoughts & Where to Find Dr. Rahman Want a deeper look? Watch the full episode on YouTube for a more visual experience of today’s discussion. This episode is best enjoyed on video—don’t miss out! Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast About the Guest: Dr. Sameena Rahman is a board-certified OB/GYN and certified Menopause Practitioner with over a decade of expertise in midlife care, sexual medicine, and concierge gynecology. After training and practicing at leading institutions including USC, the University of Chicago, and Northwestern, she founded The GSM Collective in downtown Chicago to deliver a more personalized, patient-first model of women’s healthcare. Nationally recognized for her leadership in sexual and menopausal health, Dr. Rahman serves on the Board of Directors and as Scientific Committee Chair for the International Society for the Study of Women’s Sexual Health (ISSWSH), where she is also a Fellow (IF). She is a Menopause Certified Practitioner and active member of The Menopause Society’s Education Committee, frequently speaking at national and international conferences on culturally informed care and sexual health. Connect with Dr. Sameena Rahman: Website: https://www.thegsmcollective.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/gynogirl/ Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com LINKS, EXCLUSIVE VIP DISCOUNTS, COURSES & FREEBIES 🪄 Head to Mystery Vibe for award-winning devices that deliver precise vibrations to support erectile function and more! 🛒 Link: https://tidd.ly/4mePTpF 🚨 If you are a man navigating your partner’s menopause and feel lost, check out my NEW course ‘Men Meet Menopause’! AND to celebrate the launch, iI am giving you 20% off with code MMPLAUNCH20 https://bit.ly/MeenMeetMenopause 🥰 If you want her to want you more — start by understanding her body better. Free resources → https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources 💋 Hotter, Wilder, Wiser | You’ve mastered everything else in life — now master pleasure! https://www.taboototruth.com/hotter-wilder-wiser 🔥 Ready to spice things up? This Yes/No/Maybe list is your permission slip for pleasure. https://www.taboototruth.com/free-resources-1/yes%2Fno%2Fmaybe%3F

In this episode, I'm pulling back the curtain on something that is already inside your world whether you're ready for it or not — artificial intelligence and sex. I'm breaking down four categories of AI-powered intimacy technology: smart sex toys and biofeedback devices, AI companion apps and chatbots, virtual reality experiences, and AI in sexual health and therapy. I talk about what these tools actually do, why they matter specifically for people navigating desire and relationships after 50, and the questions we're not asking loudly enough — about data privacy, about who this technology was built for, and about what happens to our capacity for real human connection when frictionless digital intimacy becomes the easier option. This is not a scare episode. This is a get-informed episode. Because you deserve to be an empowered participant in the world you're already living in. In this episode: 00:00 — Introduction: AI Is Already in Your Bedroom 01:15 — The Four Categories of AI Intimacy Tech 02:30 — Smart Sex Toys and Biofeedback Devices 04:10 — Lioness, FirmTech, WeVibe and What They Actually Do 05:30 — Haptics and Teledildonics: Physical Intimacy Across Distance 06:45 — AI Companion Apps: Loneliness, Grief, and the Limits of Digital Connection 08:30 — Virtual Reality and Intimacy: VR Therapy, Body Shame, and Immersive Content 10:15 — The Three Questions We're Not Asking About AI and Sex 12:00 — Is Technology a Bridge or a Destination? 13:15 — Closing: How to Be an Empowered Participant Want a deeper look? Watch the full episode on YouTube for a more visual experience of today’s discussion. This episode is best enjoyed on video—don’t miss out! Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Karen Bigman, a Sexual Health Alliance Certified Sex Educator, Life, and Menopause Coach, tackles the often-taboo subject of sexuality with a straightforward and candid approach. We explore the intricacies of sex during perimenopause, post-menopause, and andropause, offering insights and support for all those experiencing these transformative phases. This podcast is not intended to give medical advice. Karen Bigman is not a medical professional. For any medical questions or issues, please visit your licensed medical provider. Looking for some fresh perspective on sex in midlife? You can find me here: Email: karen@taboototruth.com Website: https://www.taboototruth.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/taboototruth YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@taboototruthpodcast Substack: https://karenbigman.substack.com Take control of your pleasure with my Pleasure Playbook, filled with tips to help you connect with your body and enhance intimacy. Download it now at www.taboototruth.com/pleasureplaybook. AI Sex Toys & Devices mentioned in this episode: Lioness — biofeedback vibrator that tracks arousal, muscle contractions, and movement patterns via app FirmTech — tech ring for men that measures nighttime erections to assess penile health🍆 Save 15% off MaxPR using code TABOO15 🛒 Link: https://myfirmtech.com/karenbigman WeVibe — app-connected couples devices with remote control and AI features https://wevibe-north-america.sjv.io/B5EzLy Tracy's Dog — app-connected devices; also developing adaptive AI avatar technology Kirroo — sync devices for partners that mirror movements in real time over the internet Save 10% off Kirroo products with code: KAREN10 at http://offers.feeliate.com/taboo